


Life with Dean

by FletcherRose



Series: Life with Dean [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Demon, F/M, Family, Fluff, Implied Smut, Other, Tumblr, daddy!dean
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-17
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-09-09 05:23:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8877634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FletcherRose/pseuds/FletcherRose
Summary: Follow Pip, Dean Winchester's partner, through her life with her man; pregnancy, kids, marriage and much more...Will the hunting life follow them, can Dean and Pip truly lead a life without demons, or will they suffer for trying?





	1. Happiness with Dean

“Dean?” My voice was a faint breath from the bathroom. Dean burst in, almost tearing the door from its hinges. He stood there for what felt like hours. Staring at me as I was hunched on the side of the bath, holding the small stick in my hands. I finally looked up at him, a tear dribbled over my cheek, falling to the floor. Dean was frozen at the doorway. Panic bore its way into his brow and settled in the fine lines on his forehead.  
My eyes searched his brilliant green ones. The corners of my mouth pulled into the smallest smile and I gave the tiniest nod.  
“Yes?” Dean asked, reanimating, his voice hoarse. I nodded harder, the smile stretching across my face.  
“Yes!” I laughed. Tears falling fast and fresh. Dean closed the distance between us in one stride and kneeled, pulling me into him. He crushed my lips with his, both our smiles making it hard to kiss, our tears of pure joy, mixing on our cheeks.  
“We’re having a baby!” He whispered, resting his forehead against mine. Our breathing steadying, realization settling in. I wiped away his tears as he wiped at mine, our hands resting on each other’s faces.  
“We’re having a baby.” I echoed against his lips. This moment was bliss. This was heaven on earth. Other than the day Dean told me he loved me, this was the happiest I’d ever been.

Dean carried me to our bedroom, laying me down so carefully on our bed. I pushed back the sheets with my feet and buried under them. Dean stripped off to his boxer-brief’s and stood staring at me, a smile lighting his face.  
“Baby, I’m so…” He hushed, his eyes beginning to well again. I held out a hand to him, waving him in to bed. He crawled under the sheets and tucked us in. He snuggled his shoulder under my arm, his head resting on my chest, his fingers splayed wide over my stomach, rubbing back and forth. His stubble tickled at the top of my breast, his shallow breaths licking at my nerve endings.  
“Pumpkin?” I whispered into his hair. He hummed his response. “I love you.”  
He lifted himself up onto an elbow and looked down at me, a softness to his eyes I never would get over. The hand that was on my stomach came up to cup the side of my face, his thumb moving lazily over my crows-feet wrinkles.  
“I love you.” He breathed against my lips.

Sam was holding Dean in an enormous brotherly embrace when I shuffled into the kitchen. Sam let go of Dean and came at me, arms extended, dimples on full display. He picked me up, swinging me around.  
“Congratulations!” He muttered into my ear. I held his head to my shoulder as he walked towards Dean, my feet still dangling. Finally he put me down, Dean instantly pulling me back against his chest, his hand on my stomach. “My two favourite people, soon to be three.” Sam sung, smiling down on us. I rubbed his side and beamed back. This was my family. These were my boys. 

***

“Be careful boys. Come home to me whole!” I said into the phone, stroking my protruding belly.  
“We will.” Sam said, almost drowned out by Dean’s response; “Love you darlin’!” I smiled and hung up.  
Dean and Sam were on a hunt. Of course they’d left me behind. Ever since our announcement Dean had put me on research duty. So I’d research whatever they wanted, hack into whatever they needed, and read all about babies. I’d downloaded so many books and had written down all the questions I’d formed while reading. The alarm on my phone woke me from my trance. 20wk Scan! It said across the screen. I swiped it off and sighed. Dean had hoped to be back for it. We’d moved the first one three times for Dean. But we couldn’t do it to the midwife again. I picked up my phone and began to dial, holding the phone to my ear as I grabbed my bag and made my way to the garage.  
“Cas, hey!” I greeted. “Wanna come to a scan?” I asked, knowing the angel wouldn’t want to miss getting a glimpse.

***

Everyone I cared about was in front of me. This mix and match of people that we considered family. All come to celebrate. Jodie had organized it, reprimanding Dean when she heard he was still hunting.  
“Your girl needs her feet rubbed, she needs you to drive her to appointments and do those God awful birthing classes.” She chided, “The mother of your child, Dean!” She brought me into a big hug, massaging the spot on my back that screamed for tough fingers. I was the size of a watermelon now, and it often felt like I had one strapped to my middle. My back ached and my feet were swelling, my breasts were huge and I was constantly hungry. Not to mention the emotional rollercoaster. My body was no longer mine, I was a passenger on this crazy ride called Pregnancy. I would be happy, then overly happy to the point of tears and as I started to cry, I’d cry harder because I was know sad that I was crying, then Dean would comfort me and I’d be mad that only he could calm me.  
I moaned under Jodie’s hand as she dug harder into the crook of my back. “Bet you don’t moan like that for Dean!” She whispered into my ear, I laughed and swatted at her.  
“Well howdy there!” Donna chimed, sidling up to us. I brought her into an awkward side hug.  
“Hey Donna, what’s news? How’s new Doug?” I said, the three of us glanced over to her man. He looked out of his element, we’d made sure to tell our guests we had normal people coming; so no talk of upstairs, downstairs, and things that go bump in the night.  
“Oh, he’s swell, you know!” She sung, beaming at him and waving her fingers. “When’s he gonna pop the question!” Jodie asked, nudging Donna in the ribs. She laughed nervously.  
“Oh, I don’t know about that.” She said, brushing off the question but kept her stare on the man she loved. Rowena was making her way towards us. It was turning into quite the women’s circle. Dean looked visibly uncomfortable.  
“Go pumpkin, have a beer for me!” I whispered into his ear, kissing it before pushing him towards Sam, Cole and Doug.

***

“Pumpkin?” I whispered into the dark room, shaking Dean’s shoulder. “Baby?” I said a little louder, shaking a littler harder. “Dean!” He woke, sitting up straight away.  
“Pip, what is it, baby?” He asked, his hand went to my back but felt it was wet. “Is that…?” He trailed off.  
“I think my water broke.” I answered, he leaned over and turned on the bedside light, looking at the bed. It was clear fluid, a good sign that it was either my waters or I’d weed myself. Dean jumped out of bed and pulled on pants and a shirt. I struggled to lift my legs over the edge of the bed.  
“Dean, a little help?” I asked, interrupting his collecting. He came over and helped me to standing, and then got me cleaned up and changed. I pointed to the bag just inside the door as I waddled out, down the hall towards the garage.  
“Sam!” Dean yelled, banging on his bedroom door as we passed. Sam stuck his head out just as we rounded the corner.  
“It’s happening?” He called out.  
“Think so!” I hollered back. He caught up to me before I’d reached the garage, helping me up the step. Dean had hurried ahead, packing the car and setting down a towel, “Just in case.” He’d said when I raised a questioning eyebrow.  
“Where’s my phone?” I asked as Dean helped lower me into the back seat.  
“I don’t know, do we need it?” Sam said, a slight edge of panic to his voice.  
“Yes, I gotta call…” I was cut off by the most unusual pain. My lower abdomen contracted, my muscles grabbing together. The baby kicked hard against my belly. I clenched my teeth, my jaw set, as I reminded myself to breathe slowly through my nose. Dean held my eyes but called to his brother.  
“Find her bloody phone, Sam!” I squeezed Dean’s hand as I rode out the contraction, releasing when the pain eased. Sam was back, holding my phone out to me. Dean pushed my legs into the well and closed the door. I dialed in and held the phone up to my ear.  
“It’s two a.m, who’s she calling?” Sam asked as he climbed into the passenger seat.  
“Who do you think?” Dean said, slamming his foot down on the accelerator.  
“Cas? It’s happening!” I said into the phone. 

***

“He’ll be here any minute.” I reassured Dean and the midwife. Cas had come to my last two scans, he’d come to half the birthing classes, he was invested in the birth of this baby. I think he was looking forward to witnessing the birth, seeing the miracle of life. It was more than nice having someone so appreciative of this gift, around.  
“Yes he will!” Dean said, pressing hard circles into the base of my spine. My cheeks puffed out as I struggled through another contraction. They were getting closer and more painful by the minute. I was desperate to wait for Cas, share this with him, but if this little kidney bean wanted to come, there was no stopping it. Sam crashed through the door just as the pain faded.  
“He’s here!” Sam announced. Cas was close behind him, his cheeks flushed from the run up.  
“Cas!” I breathed, holding a hand out to him. But as he took it, another contraction swept over me. As his fingers entered my hand I crushed them. Cas’s eyes went wide, Dean smirked, he’d experienced your vice like grip a minute ago.  
“What do you want me to do?” Sam said from the foot of the bed, wringing his hands. My cheeks puffed out, red and sweat beading on my forehead, I glared at him as I concentrated on breathing through.  
They said it was all about breathing but that was bullshit, it was about surviving a pain unimaginable. The contraction released and I huffed out the breath I was holding.  
“Drugs!” I said breathlessly. Sam have a curt nod and disappeared. Dean’s hand on my back was becoming annoying, I shrugged him off, he wiped at my forehead but I pushed his hand away. Cas’s turn to smirk.  
“Baby?” Dean asked, his eyes were filled with concern for you, but he didn’t want to piss you off further.  
“Honestly, everything you do from now on, is going to drive me insane.” I said.  
A nurse came in then, closely followed by Sam.  
“I hear you think you’re ready for an epidural?” She asks. I nod furiously at her.  
“Yep, she is!” Dean answers, I turn to him and he’s nodding as well.  
“You don’t want to-” Cas begins to ask, but I send him a look that shuts him up.  
“I’m going to ask you two to leave for a moment while we figure out where she’s at.” The nurse says to Sam and Cas, Sam leaves straight away and Cas gives my hand a squeeze before going.  
“I’m sorry, this may hurt just a little.” The nurses murmurs as she reaches between my legs. I grab hold of Dean’s arm and grit my teeth till the nurse removes her hand.  
“Phillipa?” The nurse says looking up at me, a steady hand on my leg, “You’re too far along now, this baby’s almost here!” My eyes go wide as I look at Dean, he takes my hand still on his arm, he looks just as terrified.  
“So I’m doing this natural?” I manage to ask just as another contraction comes along, but this one feels different, “I wanna push…” I pant.  
“Not just yet, Phillipa, on the next one, not just yet.” She says calmly as she pulls on a blue plastic sheet. She disappears into the hallway and calls out. I look to Dean, he wipes the tendrils of wet hair off my forehead and gives it a kiss.  
“If she calls me Phillipa one more time…” I whisper to him, anger seething through my bones. He snorts a laugh but nods.  
“Alright, Phillipa?” The nurse says, coming back into the room with two other colleagues. One is Doctor Harkness.  
“Pip, it’s just Pip.” Dean says on my behalf. The nurse smiles and nods like she knows what I said in the time she was away.  
“Hey Pip, how we doing in here?” Doc asks.  
“Oh I’m fine, it’s a holiday.” I say through gritted teeth as another contraction begins. The doctor chuckles as my sarcasm and takes a seat at the end of my bed. The two nurses pull my feet into the stirrups and place a sheet over me.  
“You feel like pushing?” The Doc asks, looking up over the sheet. I nod once and he smiles again, “Then let’s push.” I grab the backs of my knees and push down. Dean holds one of my legs, an arm around my back, his head right at my ear. I groan and cry out as I push my hardest. The veins in my neck threatening to burst, my teeth threatening to shatter.  
“Alright, good work.” The doctor says, a nurse rubs my leg comfortingly. “On the next contraction, give one more big one and we’ll have a baby!” He says calmly. I take a deep breath while I can and then along comes the desire to push. I grab Dean’s hand and squeeze with all my might, pushing into my bottom harder than before, squeezing my legs toward me.  
“You’re doing amazing, baby!” Dean whispers into my ear, wiping the sweat of my brow with his free hand.Then there’s a sense of freedom, and there’s a lot of commotion at the end of the bed, the nurses have let go of me and they’re helping the doctor.  
“Dean, do you want to cut the cord?” The doctor asks, I let go of Dean’s hand. His eyes are wide and full of awe as he joins the doc at my feet.  
I lay there panting, struggling to see my baby, our baby.  
“Congratulations,” the doctor begins, but then there’s crying and screaming from tiny lungs. Dean’s crying and clamping onto my hand. “You have a girl!” The nurses wrap up our baby and hand her to me. I cradle her head to my bosom and hold her firmly to me. I place my lips against her forehead. Dean’s lips planted against my temple, both of us welling up.  
“Mary,” I coo against her. I feel Dean freeze for a second, “Mary!” I confirm, turning to him. His tears spill over on to his cheeks, his smile brightens my soul. He pecks at my lips, nodding slightly.  
“I love you.” He breathes. I smile against his lips.  
“We love you.” I reply, turning my head to look at our sweet child.  
He bends and places a kiss on her head, her eyes just like her fathers; emerald green and surveying the scene.  
I’m aware of another set of lips on my other cheek, I look up. It’s Sam. Tears are welling in his eyes and he’s staring at his niece. His a firm hand planted on Dean’s shoulder, a warm, gentle hand on my elbow.  
“She’s amazing!” He breathed, chuckling slightly, a tear slipping down his cheek. He leaned down and placed a kiss on her forehead, and another on my cheek. I looked up then, looking for our angel. He was standing wide eyed and frozen, against the wall on the other side of the room. So he’d seen the whole procedure and was in shock. I gave a breathy laugh.  
“Cas!” I said, encouraging him to us. Dean waved him over, pulling him under his arm when he finally reached us.  
“A miracle!” Cas whispered, staring at me. The three of us looked at each other and back at Cas.  
“What, Cas!?” Dean asked. I ran a lazy finger over my baby’s cheek.  
“Life is a miracle.” He confirmed.  
“She’s a miracle!” Dean amended, looking from me to Mary. “My girls.” He sung, pressing his forehead to mine, intertwining our fingers and stroking our girls chubby cheek. Her eyes had swiveled around, checking each of us out, before slowly sliding shut.  
“How’s about we give them both some time to rest?” Doc Harkness said, none of us had registered that the three were still there. All cleaned up, out of their plastic aprons, gloves gone, sheet and stirrups put away.  
A nurse took our Baby out of my arms, ever so gently cupping her head, supporting her, carrying her to the cot all set up.  
“Congratulations again!” The doc said, his beaming smile showed he meant it. He shook Dean’s hand and planted a kiss on my cheek before leaving the room.  
“What’s the name?” The other nurse asked, a clipboard and pen at the ready.  
“Mary Judith Winchester.” I stated, smiling at Dean as he tucked sweaty strands of my hair behind my ear. Sam’s grip on my elbow tightened, he hadn’t heard the name before now. I reached for his hand and squeezed it. Turning to him, opening my arms for him. Although he was the tallest and one of the broadest men, I’d ever met, he fitted snuggly into my arms. I rubbed his back as he regained himself.  
“Mary, after your mother?” Cas asked Dean. I didn’t hear him respond but I’m sure I felt the air in the room shift as he nodded proudly.  
“What a beautiful name for a stunning daughter!” The nurse assured. I smiled back at her through hooded eyes, suddenly exhausted. “Alright you two, let’s give her some time to sleep.” She said, ushering Sam and Cas out of the room. The other nurse began to wheel the cot out.  
“Where’s she going? Where are you going?” Dean asked me then the other nurse. She paused and smiled at him, she’d seen that terrified look on hundreds of faces.  
“I’m taking her down the hall, she has her check up and a wet nurse looks after her till Pip wakes up!” She said calmly and reassuringly. Dean nodded once, watching the two nurses and our baby girl leave. I shifted over enough for Dean to climb onto the bed.  
“You did so well, baby!” He whispered into my ear, pressing his lips to my temple, wiping at my damp hair.  
“And you didn’t faint!” I responded, fighting off sleep. I heard his light chuckle, felt it roll through his chest.  
“Sleep now, baby. We’ll be here when you wake up!” He stroked my tangled, sweaty hair, and drew circles on my arm until I fell asleep. 

***

I woke up to her whining. She was working up to a cry, that would eventually end in a scream. I rolled over and reached across Dean to turn the CCTV towards us, rubbing my eyes. Dean grunted as I lay myself over his back.  
“Sleep pumpkin, I’ve got her.” I whispered, smoothing his hair over and kissing his ear, he gave a small moan before settling back into the pillow. I got up and wearily shuffled down the hall to Mary’s room.  
The boys had created a room that would grow and expand as she aged, not that I planned to raise her in the bunker. As I entered her room she bounced on her unsteady legs, holding onto the side of the cot. She smiled and stopped whining as soon as I entered. I picked her up, gosh she was getting big, at eight months, she was growing too quickly, I tucked her into my lap and unbuttoned my pajama top, lowering it and attaching her to my nipple. She grabbed at it greedily and latched on easily. I rocked back and forth in the large chair before putting my head back and falling asleep.  
I woke up to her struggling, I’d had a nice 25minute nap as she fed. I tucked myself back in and stood up, bouncing her back and forth, her head over my shoulder, patting at her back. She gurgled and babbled into my ear as I slowed the bouncing and started drawing circles on her back instead.  
I began humming to her, rocking her slowly. Her little hand at my neck, fingers wriggling. I then started singing softly, don’t be afraid, take a sad song, and make it better, remember to let her under your skin, then you’ll begin to make it better…  
She was asleep by the chorus, I said a silent prayer that she’d stay asleep as I put her in the cot, and she did. I pushed a kiss to my fingers and brushed her forehead and went back to Dean. He was sitting up in bed, waiting for me. I crawled up the sheets and kissed him, he cupped my face in his hands and held me, staring into my eyes. I smiled sleepily at him.  
“I love you.” He said sincerely.  
“I love you too!” I sighed, his hands still held my face level with his. “What’s up, pumpkin?” I asked, raising an eyebrow and straddling him, sitting back in his lap.  
“Would you marry me?” His voice was deep and gruff, his hands slipped to mine. My cheeks flushed and my lips stretched into a big grin.  
“Of course!” I squeezed his hands and leaned into his kiss. He pulled me further up his lap and I could feel his appreciation. 

***

“Unkee Sam!” Mary called as Sam opened the door. She jumped off the couch from where she’d been watching the street, and ran to the front door. Sam dropped the duffel he was carrying and caught her as she leapt up at him.  
“How’s my favourite girl?” He swung her around and pulled her into a hug, she leant back and placed her hands on his cheeks, studying his face. She let out a dramatic sigh and slipped out of his grip, pulling him, by his hand, towards the bathroom.  
I found his duffel and bent to pick it up, holding my back as I did. My back ached worse than when I was pregnant with Mary, and I was almost twice as big, but I was a week late. Sam had moved in with us the last two weeks, ready to look after her when Dean and I left for the hospital. I carried it up the stairs and dumped it in his room. Then went to find them both. He was sitting on the edge of the bath as Mary knelt in his lap plastering bandaids over his cuts. She smoothed the last one on and kissed it.  
“All better!” She announced, shuffling off his lap and patting my belly on her way out as I tousled her long, sandy hair. Sam got up and looked in the mirror.  
“I look like an abstract painting!” He commented, I laughed, resting my hands on my large tummy.  
“You’ve never looked more handsome!” I corrected, he shot me another look and I laughed again. I joined him in the bathroom and peeled them off, leaving one over a bruise to satisfy Mary. I fished around in the cabinet and pulled out antibacterial and cotton balls. I wiped a few over his cuts.  
“What was it?” I asked, although Dean and I had tried to stay out of that life, Dean sometimes joined Sam and to be honest, I was jealous.  
“A ghost,” he said shrugging, “I wasn’t prepared for the blow back when I torched him.” Sam answered my concerned look. He put a large hand on my stomach, fingers spread wide. “When do you reckon?” As he spoke, the baby kicked hard against his hand.  
“Well if he doesn’t come by end of the month, they’re evicting him!” I said, rubbing the underside. I cleaned out the last cut and let him stand up.  
“Does it hurt when they kick?” He asked, looking down at my belly.  
“Not normally, sometimes he gets a rib, but it’s when he kicks against my bladder… Speaking of which. Get out!” I said, pushing him out of the bathroom.

***

“Mary? Sweetie? Get mommy the phone!” Dean had said he’d be an hour. A case had presented itself just on the town border and Sam needed help. It had been almost two weeks, I was meant to be getting my waters broken tomorrow, but this one was stubborn and had decided tonight was it. The contractions were already building.  
“What’s wrong momma?” She said, pushing off the couch and looking up at me.  
“Your little brothers coming baby, we gotta call an ambulance.” I said as calmly as I could. She jumped off the back of the couch and ran back with the phone. I took it from her and dialed 911.  
“My waters’ just broken, I’m home alone with a three year old.” I said when the lady prompted. I gave her our address and she told me they were fifteen minutes out. I didn’t feel like I had fifteen minutes in me. I hung up and looked through my contacts. One really horrific contraction took hold and I dropped the phone, collapsing into the couch. Mary picked up my phone and put a hand on my tummy.  
“Who to call?” She asked. This little girl was too wise for only three years on earth.  
“Call Cas, baby!” I said, pushing her hair behind her ear, trying to reassure her I was ok. She smiled at me and then squeezed her eyes shut. “What’re you…?” I asked, but a flutter of wings behind me told me she’d prayed hard.  
“Pip? Where’s Dean?” Cas said, seeing my state.  
“Huntin’.” Mary answered. It almost broke my heart that we’d had to tell her about the monsters and what Mommy, Daddy and Unkee Sam, did. But as with everything, she took it in her stride.  
“Call Daddy, baby!” I pleaded. She looked through the phone as Cas took a seat next to me, putting his hands on my belly.  
“He’s close.” Cas stated.  
“I know.” I nodded, “I wanna push.” I said through gritted teeth. Cas took off his trench coat, I’d never seen him without it. Then he took off his suit jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt.  
“Daddy?” Mary said calmly into the phone, watching Cas help me lie down on the floor. “Momma says he’s coming now.” She said, I reached for the phone and Cas looked under my dress. I was beyond being shy with Cas, he’d watched Mary being born and had caught me naked twice since. Mary shrugged and handed me the phone.  
“Mary, go and get towels and water, please.” Cas asked as I held the phone to my ear.  
“Baby? What’s happening?” Dean said into the phone, my calm vanished as I heard his voice.  
“Dean!” I whispered, trying not to sob.  
“We’re on our way, Pippa, we’ll be there soon.” He assured, I could hear the roar of the impala in the background.  
“I love you, Dean.” I rasped into the phone as another painful contraction took over.  
“I love you, baby. We’re on our way.” He reassured, hanging up.  
Mary returned with a bundle of towels, her favourite blanket and a bottle of water. Cas took the towels from her and laid them underneath me.  
“This is for him, you can wrap him in it!” Mary said, handing me her blanket. I smiled at her. “How are you mommy?” She asked, sitting down at my head and stroking my hair.  
“Oh, I’m ok.” I panted. I could feel the sweat on my brow, my cheeks beet red.  
The doorbell rang, and Cas left to answer it. Paramedics followed him back into the room giving them instructions.  
“She’s two minutes between, each lasting fifty seconds.” I hadn’t been aware Cas was keeping time.  
“Looks like we’re gonna have it here!” One paramedic hushed to the other.  
“Hi Pip, my name’s Ethan, this is Amy, we’re going to help bring this little one into the world!” He said as the female hooked you up to certain devices. I pulled Cas down to my level, forcing his hand on to my back.  
“I just want to push!” I whispered to him, another contraction building, the urge to push was too much, but they were ready for it. Cas sat down, his legs on either side of me, rubbing hard circles into my back.  
“Push if you need to!” Amy said, a comforting hand on my leg as Ethan guided the head out. Three pushes and a bunch of strangled screams, later and my boy was brought into the world. Mary handed the paramedics her blanket to wrap him in. I smiled and brought her into a hug before they handed me my baby boy.  
“What’s his name?” Cas asked, still sitting behind me. Mary kissed his forehead and was cooing to him gently.  
“Chase.” I beamed up at him, taking his hand and squeezing it. “Thank you for coming.” I said, holding his gaze.  
“Wouldn't’ve missed it.” He chimed.  
The paramedics moved me onto the trolley with Chase.  
“Maymay, you were such a brave girl! I’ll see you tomorrow!” I gave her another kiss. She nodded, a tear welling in her eye. “I love you!” I said, reaching out brushing the tear off when it dribbled over. “Don’t be sad, Daddy will be home soon.” I said, Chase was starting to whine in my arms and the paramedics were becoming agitated.  
“I’m not sad mommy, you were so strong.” She smiled, “I love you!” She said, watching as I was wheeled out of the house.

***

Dean burst through the hospital room door, puffing as he came over to me, dumping my overnight bag. “I’m so sorry. I missed it. I’m sorry.” He said, peppering me with kisses.  
“It’s ok pumpkin, Mary looked after me, Cas helped me. I’m sorry he came before you arrived home.” I said, nuzzling my cheek into his palm. He smiled and kissed my forehead.  
“He’s a handsome one.” He murmured looking into the cot at my bedside.  
“Gets it all from his Dad!” I meant it. Dean brushed it off and leaned in, placing the softest kiss to his nose.  
“I love you.” He said, looking up at me. I scooted over on the bed and he nestled into me.  
“I love you more!” I countered, kissing him briefly.  
“How do you figure?” He asked between kisses.  
“I’ve given birth twice for you!” I smiled into his kiss.  
“I’ve died for you.” He replied.  
“For four seconds!” I amended. He chuckled his chest rumbling with the low noise. I fitted myself to his body and snuggled in. Our brand new addition to the family was fast asleep and I would be joining him soon.  
“Why Chase?” I heard Dean whisper after a moment. I shifted and looked up at him. “Don’t get me wrong, I love it!” He quickly added.  
“Your Impala was your first baby…?” I said, he didn’t get where I was going. “It’s a Chevy.” He still wasn’t following. “There’s an actor called Chevy Chase…” His jaw dropped.  
“Missus Brains over here!” He said, squeezing my shoulder, “How long had you been stewing on that?” He asked, peering over my head into the cot.  
“Since Mary!” I yawned, it almost hurt with the severity of my exhaustion.  
“Chase it is.” He breathed into my hair. I bundled him closer, nuzzling my head into his chest, and fell asleep in his strong arms.

***

“Are you ok?” Jodie asked over the phone. I hoisted Chase further up my hip and steadied Mary as she climbed up my shoulder, using my hair as a rope.  
“Two children under five? Yea! I’m fine!” I joked with her. Sam came into the kitchen then, grabbing Mary on his way past. Flinging her into the air and catching her. Giggles filling the room.  
“I’ll be there by six.” I confirmed, “Thanks again, Jodie. I can’t begin to tell you how much it means!”  
“I can’t wait to have quality time with those rugrats! It’s been too long!” Jodie said happily, her radio going off in the background. “Listen, Pip, I gotta go, but I’ll see you at six!” The phone went dead.  
“Jodie?” Sam asked, Mary now sitting quietly on his shoulders, plaiting his hair, as he took a large bite of a sandwich.  
“Yea, we’ll drop these two off tomorrow evening.” I said, taking a bite from the other side of his sandwich. When Sam hadn’t moved out after Chase came along, he quickly learnt nothing he had was truly his! I reached up and took the empty bottle from Chase as he let it go.  
“We good?” Dean asked as he came into the room.  
“Daddy!” Mary squealed, falling backwards off Sam’s shoulders as Dean walked past. Although she did this all the time and Dean always caught her. It never ceased to send my stomach plummeting. Chase reached out for Dean, beginning his wind up cry when Mary shot him a I’m the favourite look.  
“Yep! We’ll drop them to Jodie at six and the week is ours!” I said, settling Chase against Dean’s hip till he wound an arm under him.  
“What’s up, buddy?” He asked, looking down at Chase. He stopped whining as soon as Dean showed him attention.  
“We should arrive in Wisconsin by eight the next morning if we keep on going from Jodie’s.” Sam announced, popping the last tiny bite of his sandwich into Mary’s mouth.  
“Well, baby’s packed and ready.” Dean said as Mary’s energy peaked again and she stood up on his hip as he held her by a wrist. It looked quite awkward.  
“And we’ll leave the kids car at Jodie’s.” I added. We’d been planning this getaway over the past couple of days, Sam would stay with the kids and give Dean and I time off, a couple of days together without the little ones interrupting; but Donna rang with a case. So Sam was joining us. A hunt, just like the old days. 

***

“Thank you again, Jodie!” I said kissing her cheek as Clare tried prying Chase’s hands off Dean’s arm.  
“They’ll be fine, just be careful and have a good time!” Jodie replied, resting a hand on Mary as she leant against Jodie’s legs.  
“I love you, baby! Look after Chaz and be good for Aunty J!” I said, kneeling to Mary’s level and bringing her into a crushing hug.  
“Go gank the baddies, Momma!” She cheered. I flicked Dean a look for her use of the word gank and then planted a kiss on her forehead.  
She gave Dean a big hug and kissed him on the lips, whispering something into his ear before letting him go. Then she gave Sam a hug and kiss and disappeared inside. Alex was holding a crying Chase.  
“Oh Dear! I’m sorry!” I said to her, she shrugged and kept bouncing him. I patted my jacket pockets and pulled out a dummy, sticking it in his mouth as I kissed his chubby cheek.  
“We love you!” I hushed into his ear and rubbed his back once.  
“Get out of here. Before you change your mind!” Jodie said, pushing us out the door towards the impala. I handed her the keys to the four wheel drive and gave one last look over my shoulder before Dean pulled me under his arm and ushered me down the path.  
“What did she say?” I asked as he kissed the top of my head.  
“I can’t tell you!” He teased. I prodded his rib. “I promised!”  
“Well, a promise is a promise!” I said sarcastically. Sam laughed as he rounded the car. “What do I have to do to sit in the front seat?” I whined. Dean opened the back passenger door for me.  
“Be his brother!” Sam laughed, Dean smiled in response, the adorable wrinkles around his eyes more prominent. I couldn’t help but smile back.


	2. Kids with Dean

Dean nodded at Sam and I, as he opened the door. Our guns at the ready, our eyes adjusted to the night. We kept low and crept in to the cabin. Dean waved Sam into the room to our left. Sam broke off to sweep through. Dean waved me forwards and broke off to the right. I prowled forward, into the end room. I heard a creak before I reached the room. I paused, ears pricked. There was a footstep. I rushed forward and swung to the right. A slight, female saw me and ran towards the screen door. I shot once, clipping her arm. She kept moving. I heard another two shots in the rooms behind me but I was on her trail. I followed her out the door, sprinting into the woods after her.

I shot again as she took a sharp turn left. I could hear one of the boys call my name. I wasn’t about to let her get away, though. I kept running. I stopped, steadying my arm, I fired a few more shots. She took one but disappeared into the trees. I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I was holding. I couldn’t hear anything but my pulse, hammering in my ears. Suddenly I was acutely aware I was deep in the woods with no sense of the direction of which direction I’d come from. I had run straight before stopping, so I turned back and began walking, trying my best not to crunch twigs with my boots. After a few minutes I could hear the boys calling out. I rounded a tree and their they were, standing on the back porch. Relief washed over me.  
“Pip, don’t ever…” Dean had started, stepping off the porch and running at me. But then his heels dug into the ground. He froze. It felt like minutes, but it was a matter of seconds. I looked from Dean’s reaction to Sam. His gun came up, aiming at me. I turned. The female from before was driving the knife forward. I ducked sideways, collecting the blade on the way down. I dropped to the ground as the shot rang out. Her body collapsed back. A whole between her eyes. I could feel my heartbeat in my face. A warm feeling spread across my cheek and dribbled down my neck. Dean was rolling me over. Sam ran past me to check the female was dead.  
“Jesus.” Dean uttered looking at me, “Sam!” He barked, “Med Kit!”  
Dean shrugged off his flannel and balled it up. Pressing it to my face. As he did so the pain caught up to me. My adrenaline ebbing. My face tingled with a searing, white, heat running the length of my cheek. From just under my eye to my jaw. I was now acutely aware of what had happened. The female had caught my cheek as I ducked, slicing deep into my face. I raised a hand to my face, placing my fingers over Dean’s. He looked into my eyes, although he was concerned there was also anger hiding there.  
“I’m ok, Dean!” I said, noting it hurt to talk. I could taste blood, almost feel the cut through my cheek. I clutched at Dean and struggled to sit up. He helped me up, then helped me to stand.  
“What the hell were you thinking? Running off on your own?” He was holding back, had I been fine we’d be having a screaming match. I kept quiet, there was nothing to say. He was right. I shouldn’t’ve run off. “We have two kids that need you! They’re waiting for you to come back. Had Sam not been there…” Dean trailed off, his words brought tears to my eyes. I had been selfish and given chase before thinking.  
Sam had fished out the med kit and vodka by the time we reached the car. I leant against the bonnet and peeled the flannel away from my cheek for Sam to look at. His face paled and his eyes went wide. I knew it was horrific.  
“I can’t stitch this…” Sam whispered. I gave a slight nod. “I’ll patch you up as best I can, but…” He trailed off. I leant forward slightly as he began to pour the alcohol over my face. I sucked in a harsh breath. The sting was worse than birth. I grabbed at Dean’s arm, piercing his flesh with my nails.

I sat in the back as Dean sped towards the hospital. It was deathly quiet in the car, each of us thinking over what could’ve happened.  
“Be strong.” Dean’s voice was so quiet I wasn’t sure he’d actually said it. But Sam looked over at him as well.  
“What?” Sam said. Dean looked into the rear view mirror, his emerald eyes boring into mine.  
“Mary told me to Be strong like Mommy.” Dean said clearly. My eyes prickled again. It hurt to hear that now. “You know why she said that, cause she knows I live in fear of anything happening to you!” Dean’s voice was thick with emotion. “Losing my family.” Dean looked at Sam this time. I was holding a fresh bandage to my face, but with my free hand I reached over the seat and squeezed Dean’s shoulder. My hand tracing up to his neck. My fingers rubbing rough lines into his hairline. Sam wiped at his eyes and looked out the window.  
“I never meant to scare either of you,” I murmured, sliding forward to hang over the back of their seat, “You both are what I live for, the two munchkins are why I get up in the morning.” Fresh tears sprang to my eyes. Sam turned back to look at his brother.  
“You’re my home, Dean. The family that you’ve created. It’s home to me.” He whispered, his throat closing over. I shifted, letting go of Dean’s neck and grabbing Sam’s shoulder. Kissing the side of his head, tears and snot mixing into his hair. We were all a blubbering mess.

 

“Mommy looks a little different, that’s all.” I reassured Mary through the phone, face time was a blessing and a curse.  
“So you did something silly?” She amended. This girl was mothering me.  
“Mommy was more than silly…” Dean said over my shoulder. He gave my shoulders a reassuring squeeze and when he saw my mouth part he kept massaging.  
“Kiss it better, Daddy!” Mary demanded, the phone too close to her face, all we could see were her eyes and nose. Dean brushed his lips over the bandage on my cheek. Mary squealed with delight. Since she was a baby, she thrilled at the sign of affection, be it on TV, us or even random people in public.  
“All better!” Dean said, his brilliant smile lighting up his face.  
“Darlin’, put Aunty J on the phone.” I asked. Mary looked around and began moving, calling out. I looked up at Dean then, both of us exhausted from the night’s exploits.  
“Bye mommy!” Mary chimed, focusing on the camera, “Daddy, take care of her, cause I’m not there.” She instructed. I chuckled as Dean gave the back of my neck a gentle squeeze.  
“Oh I will! Give Chaz kisses from us!” He told her, blowing a kiss. She held the phone up to her lips and gave the camera a kiss before handing it to Jodie.  
“Thank you sweetheart! Go find Alex, she’ll get you breakfast.” Jodie said to Mary before turning her attention to us. “I knew something was gonna happen, you daft twit.” She scolded us.  
“Mornin’ to you too, Jodie.” Dean said.  
“How bad is it?” She asked, acknowledging Dean’s statement with a nod.  
“It’ll leave a small scar, but it’s fine, we’re just tired now.” I assured.  
“Yea, well.” Jodie said, still glaring at us. “Take your time, rest up, all’s well here.” She confirmed.  
“How’s Chaz going? The songs work last night?” Dean asked. When we got Chase home from the hospital, we’d began singing to him to lull him to sleep. We hadn’t realized till a month in that now he’d only sleep if someone was singing. So Dean had the idea of recording our songs, so as Jodie or one of the girls didn’t have to stand there singing till he was off in dream land.  
“Worked a treat, he wasn’t too sure at first, but we got him down!” Jodie assured. I nodded and yawned.  
“Thank you again, Jodie!” I drawled, sleep was calling to me like a siren.  
“I’ll let you go. Dean, take care of her. Pip, don’t do anything more stupid.” She said. He nodded and blew her kisses and hung up. I put the phone back on the sideboard and turned into Dean’s arms resting my good cheek on his shoulder. He rested his head on top of mine as his thumbs moved back on forth on my back. I tucked my hands under the back of his shirt, resting them on his warm skin.  
“Bed?” I murmured. He hummed his response, but neither of us moved, too tired to do anything, too rapt in each other to care.

“Pip? The songs aren’t working!” Clare almost yelled on the other end of the phone. I could hear Chaz screaming on the other end.  
“Have you tried the afternoon-?” I began before being interrupted.  
“I’ve tried them all, he’s been fed, had a clean diaper changed, he doesn’t have a temp, he’s just…” She sounded panicked and exhausted. Just like the tired screams of a stubborn baby would do to anyone. I looked up at Sam, we’d gone early that morning, to collect groceries, while Dean slept in. Sam jut his hips out to the side, signaling the specific style of rocking Chaz, on occasion, liked.  
“Try this, instead of swaying him, deliberately and awkwardly stick your hip out, one side to the other. No fluid movements, just deliberate.” I tried, it was hard to explain without showing her. I listened to the other end of the phone, there was a bit of rustling, but the screaming didn’t stop. It broke my heart to hear him, his little lungs probably going raw.  
“Nope.” Clare answered. A woman walked past us in the store, staring at the noise coming from my ear piece.  
“Uhh…” I didn’t know what else to try, normally we’d pass him between all of us, singing, till he finally calmed. “Is Mary there?” I asked. Clare called out to Mary, more rustling as she went to find her.  
“Momma?” Her little voice chimed.  
“Is she rocking like Uncle Cas?” I asked, I’d do pleasantries later. Sam moved down the aisle, adding things to the trolley as I pushed it slowly, listening intently to what was happening. Mary’s little voice sounded in the background, instructing and showing Clare.  
“He’s not sleeping.” She came back to the phone. “Sing with Daddy and Unkee Sam.” She suggested, I didn’t have Dean with me, and his voice was the one that did the trick.  
“I’m not with Daddy at the moment, sweetie.” I informed.  
“That’s ok…” She left the phone. I could hear Clare in the background, pleading for Chase to go to sleep. Mary came back to the phone, the soft strum of guitar in the background signaling Dean’s solo song he’d recorded. “You and Unkee Sam can sing to this.” The music got louder, this kid was a genius. But I was in a grocery store. The screaming on the other end got louder. Any sense of embarrassment or public decency went out the window. I tugged Sam back to my side by his shirt and held the phone between our ears.  
I started singing softly into the phone.  
Momma told me, when I was young, she’d sit beside me…  
Sam stared at me, I gave him my best puppy dog eyes as I kept singing, he chimed in. If you do this, it’ll help you some sunny day… The screaming became crying. Take your time, don’t live too fast… Crying became whimpering. And be a simple kind of man, maybe someday you’ll love and understand… The whimpering stopped, there was quiet on the other end of the line, but we dared not stop. Won’t you do this, for me son, if you can…  
We finished the song and waited with baited breath for any stir from Chase. Nothing. I heard the faintest click, then Clare’s whisper came back down the line.  
“It worked, he’s out. Thank you so much.” I could imagine her, blonde hair a mess, red eyes, holding back the tears that came after a tough put down.  
“That’s ok, hope he stays down for you. Call if there’s anything else.” I whispered back before hanging up.  
“That’s the worst I’ve heard him.” Sam said, straightening, pushing his hair back from his face.  
“I don’t think I’ll be able to leave him till he’s a teen!” I joked, but deep down I truly felt like that was what I’d do. We collected the last few bits from the list and went to the cashier.  
“Is your baby asleep?” The woman behind the counter asked shyly. Sam and I gave each other a raised eyebrow look before returning to her. “The singing?” She prompted.  
“Oh…” I wiped at the back of my neck, how many people had heard that. “Yea, thanks!” I could feel my cheeks blushing, the one under the bandage especially, retaining all that heat.  
Sam helped pack the groceries as I paid. As I picked up the last bag the woman stopped us.  
“You two make a beautiful couple, I bet your baby is gorgeous.” She said before greeting the next customer. Sam and I laughed at that.

 

Back at the motel, Dean was awake, sitting in bed, laptop open. Sam and I had the giggles over the whole experience.  
“What’s up?” Dean said, clearly feeling left out of the joke.  
“You just missed the weirdest shopping trip.” Sam said, putting the bags down on the table and beginning to unpack. I climbed onto the bed and under Dean’s arm as he held it out for me.  
“Clare rang; Chaz was screaming the house down over a nap. We tried everything, Mary even showed her how to rock like Cas.” Sam wiggled his hips (demonstrating the odd move Cas had formulated) as he bent into the fridge, Dean pulled out the pillow from behind us, playfully throwing it at him.  
“And that didn’t work?” Dean asked, it was a last resort one night, and with such forced movements we were all in awe of how he fell asleep like that … But whatever works, you don’t question it.  
“No, right!” I said, sharing the same astonishment. “So Mary puts your song on speaker, and gets us to sing along…” I say, another round of giggles takes over.  
“So here we are, standing in the middle of a small town grocer, singing Simple Man for everyone to hear. And at the end of it all, the checkout chick thinks we’re the parents and compliments us!” Sam finishes before we both fall about laughing at the memory. Dean chuckles.  
“Hope she gave you a discount on account of your stunning beauty!” Dean said, pulling me tighter against him.

I got the stitches out the day before we left. The skin was healing nicely, and the doctor reckoned in a month it would be a thin, silver, line, in a year it’d look like an inch-long pillow crease over my cheek bone. As long as I didn’t aggravate. But for now, it was an angry, red scar that ran from the bag under my left eye to my jaw line.  
“Let me take you out tonight!” Dean said as we left the hospital. Sam had made himself scarce today.  
“You wanna show this off?” I said pointing at the scar. His hand at the back of my neck pulled my face to his lips as he kissed along the side of the scar.  
“No, I wanna show this off.” He corrected, waving a hand over my whole body. I laughed.  
“Momma bod?” I asked, he brought my lips to his, kissing them gently a few time.  
“You’re stunning.” He whispered against them.  
“I know.” I replied, flicking my hair over my shoulder. He chuckled, his warm breath tickled my face.  
“Date night.” He whispered into my ear before nipping at the lobe. My body melted under him. A soft moan left my lips. “So that’s a yes?” He breathed, sucking at a spot on my neck that made me weak at the knees. This green eyed, tall, handsome, man knew how to play me.  
“Yes.” I moaned. He pulled away and gave me a warm smile. I missed the contact already, even though his hands were still on my hips.  
“Great! Got it all planned! But first you’re having a well-earned girl’s day with Donna!” My shoulders slumped a little. As much as I loved Donna, Dean had me ready for a day with him. He laughed, knowing what I was thinking. He opened the door for me and I slid into the front passenger seat of the impala.

After an amazingly relaxing day at a spa with Donna, I was feeling ready for whatever Dean had planned.  
“Coffee? Juice? Water?” Donna asked, unlocking her house.  
“Thanks Donna, Dean should be along soon.” I chimed. I felt like I was floating.  
“About that…” Donna said, turning to me as she closed the door behind us. I looked at her, suspicious already. “He’s dropped off a dress for your night, and then I’m taking you to him.” Donna said, a smile beginning to creep across her face.  
“Donna?” I started towards her, “What’s going on?” I asked, I knew she was holding back.  
“Oh! I’m no good at secrets…” She gave up under my tough stare. She led me to the spare room, pulling me by my newly manicured hand. She opened the door and shoved me in.  
Hanging on the wall opposite was the dress I’d bought three years ago when Dean had asked me to marry him. My mouth dropped open.  
“Your date night is your wedding.” Donna muttered behind me. My jaw hit the floor. I was, for the first time ever, speechless. I finally came back to myself.  
“The kids?” I asked turning back to her, tears pricking my eyes.  
“He’s organized everyone!” She said, as teary as I was. She brought me into a bone crunching hug.

The barn doors opened and faint music began to play. Jodie and Donna had waited with me outside, keeping me calm and tear free. I was excited and nervous. I just wanted to see Dean, but at the same time, knowing my babies were just a few feet away I was desperate to have them in my arms. A week away and I was already a mess.  
Mary came charging up the aisle, in a white, tulle dress, she looked like a marshmallow. She flung herself up at me and I bent to catch her, sweeping her into a large hug!  
“Momma, you’re beautiful.” She said, pushing the hair back off my face. Donna had done a great job with the makeup, my scar only just visible. She’d taken all the red out of it. She planted a light kiss, she had Dean’s gentle touch, over the scar and pulled back to look me over. “Daddy’s down there!” She turned in my arms, pointing to the end of the aisle. I followed her finger and saw Dean. The apple green eyes piercing my soul. His bright smile warming me, even at this distance. He was my magnet. I felt the irrefutable pull to him, I needed to be next to him. With him.  
“Better not keep him waiting, then.” I whispered into Mary’s ear. She giggled and slid down to the ground. She lead the way, Donna and Jodie following in time with the music. Just now I realized Chuck was sitting in the corner, strumming a guitar, the song was something Dean and I had found when looking for easy listening for Chaz, Hey Darlin. I hurried down the aisle to my soon to be husband! Cas and Sam looked handsome in their suits. And Cas was holding Chase on his hip, swaying him slightly. I reached Dean, his hand circling mine, I reached up and pressed my lips to his, a slow peck before the main kiss. “Hey Darlin’!” He whispered.  
“Hi pumpkin.” I breathed against him, smiling as we pulled apart. His eyes were swimming already, which of course, set me off. A man cleared his throat, Chuck had appeared next to us. I hadn’t noticed the happy silence that had fallen over the small gathering.  
“Friends, family…” he started.

Our vows were perfect for two hunters, already with children; I promise to love, protect and respect… Till the end. As death hadn’t stood in Dean’s way before, nor would either of us let it, Chuck forbid! Dean had designed our rings, oh so simple, yet oh so perfect. Silver and iron, intertwined like a vine.  
“You may now, finally, kiss your wife!” Chuck announced. Dean pulled me to him, just as immediately, as I did him. Our lips met, joining us as one. He held me against his body as I held his head to mine. Our kiss turned more passionate than ever before, if it were at all possible. A new feeling of belonging washing over us both. When we broke apart everyone was cheering. If you’d heard from a distance, you would’ve guessed hundreds had turned out. Dean and I crossed over. Sam picked me off the ground. His lips pressing into my good cheek. His arms crushing me. But all was good, we were finally, officially, brother and sister in law.  
“You’re stunning, sister!” He said, beaming from ear to ear. I kissed his cheek as he put me down. Chase was reaching out for me, I plucked him out of Cas’s arms and gave him a peck as he wound a chubby fist into my hair. I pulled Cas in. He was stiff and formal, as always. But it was like he was now a brother too. I kissed his cheek and ruffled his hair. He smiled, his cheeks slightly flushed. I turned back, Dean had Mary sitting on his hip. I smiled at the girls, puckering my lips and blowing a kiss, before sharing in another kiss with my husband. Dean and I walked down the aisle. Arms around each other. Our babies on our hips. Husband and Wife.

As soon as Donna had told me about the wedding, and the general giddiness had given way to clear thinking, I made a few phone calls and finally got the first dance song changed to Someday Soon by Judy Collins. At the reception we’d had dinner first, scooping mash off Chase’s chin, fighting with a tired Mary to eat anything on the plate. Then speeches where Jodie told of our chance encounter, how she’d locked me up before I’d finally given in to murdering a werewolf. She’d let me go and put me in touch with the boys… taking all the credit for where we were now. Sam’s speech was embarrassing, how he’d known Dean was head over heels before even Dean was aware. Watching the incessant flirting before I’d finally made the first move. How he’d then spent night after night wishing motel walls were thicker and sound proof. Then our dance. Dean was shocked when the music came on. I smiled at him, pulling him up from his seat and whispering in his ear.  
“I hear you hum it when you don’t think anyone’s around!” I kissed his earlobe and he pulled me out to the middle of the makeshift dance floor. Dean had moves, where he had he been hiding them…! He spun me around, showing me off, then pulled me in, slowing down. Holding me impossibly close to him. He whispered the lyrics into my ear as I kept my lips to his pulse. 

“Dancing with Mary tonight, you looked more handsome than ever.” I panted between kisses. Dean and I were in a hotel room, child free again, frantic to get each others clothes off. I pulled at his jacket as he fiddled with the zipper at the back of my dress.  
“Missus Winchester, you never cease to be beautiful.” He murmured into my mouth.  
“Say it again!” I breathed.  
“You never-!” He chuckled as I smacked at him. “Missus Winchester!” I smiled as I stepped back. Finally, we were naked and I wanted to take him in. It was like seeing him for the first time. “What?” His eyes were focused on mine.  
“I’ve never seen a married man naked before!” I teased. He moved in one fluid moment then, sweeping my feet from underneath me and carrying me to the bed as I squealed in surprise.

***

“Hey there!” I sung as Garth came into the kitchen, following his nose. He brought me into the kindest, warmest, hug and planted a kiss on my cheek.  
“Hey Pip!” He greeted. I had only ever heard Garth happy, I wasn’t sure he had the capacity for hate, nor anger. I wasn’t sure how he’d become a hunter, but I was glad he had. It brought him to Dean and made him family.  
“This is Alexis.” I introduced, nodding at the woman cutting up greens.  
“Nice to finally meet you!” Garth said, extending a hand. She wiped hers on her jeans and shook, then returned to cutting up the beans. Alexis was Sam’s girlfriend of three years, we’d met her on a hunt. A shifter had come into her hospital, she was a doctor, remaining calm through all we told her. She then patched us up after and stuck around.  
“We’ll be ready in an hour.” I said, seeing his eyes roam over the food on the bench. He held up the bottle of wine and I jutted my chin at the cooler on the floor. He placed it in, grabbed himself a beer and disappeared back out to the main room. I put the potatoes into the oven and looked around the kitchen.

“Veggies are the only thing left!” Alexis said, looking at the list I’d written up. I dusted off my hands and undid my apron, draping it over the counter. Alexis topped up her glass as I grabbed a beer, cracking it on the side of the bench, leaving the kitchen to join everyone in the main room. The room was buzzing with excited chatter, everyone catching up on each-others lives. Alexis bee-lined for Sam, dodging Garth as he chased after Mary and Chase. Cas was in deep conversation with Dean, Crowley and Chuck. Rowena was talking with Alex and Clare. Donna and Jodie were having a good laugh. Sam, lifted his arm and brought Alexis into his side, listening to Doug (Donna’s beau) describe something to Garth’s wife, Bess. I smiled at our large family, moving towards Jodie and Donna. I ran my hand across Dean’s back, his hand dragging along my arm till I passed, a subconscious reaction.

Thanks giving dinner was always a big holiday, but our large family gathered together for Christmas and Easter as well. Making memories and sharing our lives, like families should. Chase had fallen asleep across Crowley’s lap, though he didn’t seem to mind, gently stroking at his hair. Rowena had Mary cuddled on her lap, although Mary was seven now, she seemed to love the attention, sharing secrets and giggling as Rowena used magic to rearrange the sauce on her plate to resemble the town and the crumbs to sprinkle above it like snow. All of us were in a state of utter bliss. Full stomachs, sitting with loved ones on a lazy afternoon. Garth and Bess were cuddled together, Doug was tracing circles into Donna’s palm as they spoke quietly with Alex, Clare and Jodie. Dean had his hand on the back of my chair, his hand moving up and down my arm. Crowley whispering with Chuck. That’s when I noticed Alexis was leaning against Sam’s chest, his arm draped over her shoulder, his hand on her stomach, whispering happily into her ear. I’d seen that look before, on Dean’s face when we were cuddled together when I was pregnant. I nudged Dean’s leg and he broke his conversation with Cas and followed my gaze. He smiled down at me and raised an eyebrow. Cas followed our questioning looks and went back to his conversation with Dean, a subtle smile playing at his lips. I didn’t need an angel, though. I could feel it in my bones. I stood, collecting plates, making my way around the table. As Alexis leaned forward to help, I stopped her. 

“Congratulations!” I whispered to them. They both stood to assist the cleanup. When I reached the kitchen, I dumped the plates I was carrying, snatched hers to the bench and pulled her into a big hug.  
“When did this happen?” I asked, “How far along? Why didn’t you tell me?” I couldn’t stop. She chuckled as Sam moved the plates to the sink.  
“I told you she’d know.” He teased. I looked between them both, waiting for answers.  
“Two months, we found out three weeks ago, we were waiting for this weekend to tell you!” She finally answered. I brought her into another hug then put my hands on her stomach. She was a little bigger than I was at two months. Yes, she was probably carrying the world’s tallest baby, but I got the feeling she was holding something back. I looked up at her and raised an eyebrow.  
“See!” Sam said, joining us. Alexis laughed again, I looked to Sam for an answer. “Twins.” He said, his smile growing, stretching from ear to ear.  
“He said you’d figure it out before even god himself.” Alexis shared. I laughed with them, Cas and Dean joined us, carrying the rest of the tables contents.  
“Congrats bro.” He said, bringing his brother into a bone crushing hug. Cas hugged Alexis, his cheeks flushing, and with one glance at me I could read in his eyes that he was thinking what I was; once it was just us, now we have an ever growing family. How lucky we are.

***

Dean stretched out in the new bed, that went with the new room, new house. He noted the spot next to him was empty. He sat up and lifted himself out of bed, rubbing at his eyes and scratching at the back of his neck. He padded down the hallway to the kitchen where the coffee had just finished brewing. He looked out the large bay windows and spotted Pip sitting on the swing seat, staring into the woods. The sun hadn’t risen yet but the sky was a dull gray, and mist was seeping out of the woods. He poured two mugs of coffee and added milk to one. He took a sip of his black and sighed. He wandered out to Pip and kissed her cheek, placing the mug into her hand. He lowered himself slowly on to the seat and brought her under his arm. Planting another two kisses in her hair before settling back into the cushion.  
“I wanna go hunting.” I murmured after a few long sips of my milky coffee. Dean also missed it, I knew it. The undeniable itch of slaying something bad in the world. Knowing everyone was a little safer without, whatever it was, free to walk the earth.  
“We promised.” Dean said after a while. We’d both gone on a hunt without telling the other, dropping the kids at Jodie’s. I’d asked Cas to come with and Dean had gone with Sam. I was sure those fights would be the end of us. Especially when he’d come back with a new scar. After making him sleep on the couch, almost kicking him out of the house and more screaming, I’d come to realise; we were the same and no amount of screaming would change our minds. So instead, we’d promised we wouldn’t hunt again. With the exception to something particularly evil and in that case, we’d hunt together.  
“Paintball?” I asked, finally looking up at him, waiting. A small smile stretched across his face.  
“Good day for it!” He replied, clouds had covered the sky, even with daylight it’d still be dark in the woods. I kissed his neck, he brought my face to his and caught my lips. We savored each other’s taste of coffee and morning breath before breaking apart. I downed the last mouthful of my coffee and took his mug. I’d already dressed earlier for the woods, living in hope. I smacked at his ass as he walked away, couldn’t help myself. That man never ceased to turn me on, no matter what time of day, no matter where we were. 

“Mary, paintball?” I said, lightly shaking her ankle. Her chest rose before her head came off the pillow. She was so like her father, grumpy when woken, but could go for days without sleep. I left her and went to Chase’s room. I opened the door and saw him move. He was like me, woken by the smallest sound in our vicinity. Dean had once opened my door before we’d started dating, he was greeted by a knife when he reached to shake me awake. I crept further into his room, making sure to stay silent as I could. I grabbed his back and began tickling. His gasp turned into a loud laugh as he rolled over, kicking and squirming.  
“Paintball?” I asked. He jumped from the bed to the floor and began grabbing his clothes. I smiled and left him to it.

Mary was the last to join us, tying her hair as she dropped off the verandah. Chase already half way across the field, Dean kissed his girl good morning before running after him. I handed her a rifle and dragged her under my arm.

“Boys, girls?” She asked, looking up at me. I nodded smiling. “They’re going down.” She said, a certain calm and focus crossing her features. We’d done this twice since moving in. Once during the day and once at night. It was more to familiarize the kids with the woods and hitting targets through the trees, if, heaven forbid, anything were to come after us. Dean and I had agreed to take a back seat, let the kids guide us, but at the end of the day, we’d make it about having fun, not about the training. Dean was intent on never being like his father and I was intent on giving them the childhood I never had. Holidays were a massive family event, everyone came together, lots of food and gifts and most of all, laughs. 

Mary nodded to my left and I tracked away from her, staying a step or so behind so as I could keep an eye on her. She held up a fist and I stopped. She’d been watching cop shows again. She crouched low and I followed. Straining our ears, we finally heard it. A crunch of leaves. Mary looked back at me, held up two fingers and then pointed in front of us. I nodded, the boys were coming head on. She looked up at the tree towering over her. Its branches stretched thick and wide in the canopy. She slung her gun over her shoulder and stuck her finger into the bark, kicking her shoe against it. Gaining grip. She clambered up to the first branch, then heaved herself up another three. She was four meters up. I silently begged her to stop. And she did. Wedging herself into the fork and flattening over its extended branch. As she pulled her rifle around to her front she looked down to me. She definitely didn’t learn this kind of stealth from Dean or I. She gestured for me to swing wide by fifty meters and trek out a hundred before coming back. I’d round the boys towards her. I nodded and moved off as she pulled the rifle to her front and closed one eye, flipping out the makeshift scope.

Chase was like his mother. He’d had a plan, remembering how his mom had hunted before and using that to track how she’d move this time. Dean listened as Chase laid out the idea, they’d go in together, spread out at the small creek and sweep to the fence. Dean followed him in, split from him (as far as he could without losing sight of Chase) and tracked toward the fence. Chase was also like his mom in that he was light footed, his tread was deliberate and silent. Dean had once smiled at the thought of his son surprising a monster, ganking it before they knew what hit them. But his smile slipped as he realized how messed up that fantasy was. He would much rather see his son graduate high school.

A few leaves crunched under Dean’s boot. He stopped and crouched, looking for Chase’s reaction. He’d done the same. Chase looked back at his dad and held a hand to his lips before moving on. Dean paid closer attention to where he was stepping but he crunched some more, he couldn’t help it. Chase dropped to the ground as a pellet flew through the air, missing Dean by a hair. Dean whipped around, crouching low and shuffling toward a tree for protection, but he didn’t get there fast enough. The next pellet smacked his shoulder, just above his heart. His bottom jaw jutted out and he stood up, holding his gun above his head, as he did another pellet hit his high thigh. He’d seen where this one came from and saw his wife give him a cheeky smile and a wink before disappearing into the shrubs. Chase had seen her to and was after her. Dean stood still, feeling the sites of the paint, swell already. He’d have to wait here till he heard the whistle of the lone survivor. 

Mary saw her Dad duck down and swivel around, looking for her Mom. She lined up and caught his shoulder. She had been aiming for his chest, just over his heart. She watched him raise his gun then stagger as he was hit again. She laughed to herself and then stopped as she saw her little brother scurrying through bush. She tried to line him up but he was too fast. When she pulled back to have another general look, he was too well camouflaged. She waited, Mom would bring him round. Hopefully.

Chase took off after his Mom, seeing her shoot Dad. He kept low as he sprinted through the brush. He was the perfect height to crouch and be concealed by the tall grass. His Mom was running in front of him, but as he lined up, she disappeared. He fell to his stomach. This was her tactic. She’d make herself bait and then tear out of sight, come back around and collect them from behind. He turned on his stomach and lined up his eye with the barrel, waiting for her to appear from behind. And sure enough she did. He was so well covered she was almost on him before he shot. It caught her square in the chest. It would really bruise and swell at close range. He popped up from hiding as she raised her gun above her head.  
“That’s for dad!” He said, sharing the same cheeky smile before running off. 

“Mary lined him up. He was still a fair way off, not as close as Dad. She licked her finger and held it to the air. She’d seen the snipers in movies do this. She readjusted and lined him up again. Aiming for his stomach, trying not to hurt him too much. She fired. He stepped aside. She pushed herself back to sitting as she twisted around for another shot. A paint ball splattered above her. She shot again as Chase did.

“Dad!” Chase yelled out. I heard his voice echo and slung the gun behind me and ran towards his voice.  
“Pip!” Dean’s voice boomed as I got closer. I rounded the last tree and saw it. Mary was lying on the floor of the woods, her leg twisted to the side, an angle that couldn’t be possible without a break. Dean was kneeling beside her, Chase standing a foot away, looking on in horror. She wasn’t moving.  
“Baby?” Dean hushed, touching her shoulder. I fell to my knees on her other side.  
“Mary?” I tried, her eyes remaining closed. I looked back at Chase. “How did she land, baby?” I asked him, holding a hand out to him. He looked up from her to my hand to me, almost surprised to see me.  
“Maymay?” Dean tried again, he was holding back tears, I could hear it in his voice.  
“Chaz, sweetie?” I said, a little more urgent, pulling him to my side. I rubbed his back, a subconscious move.  
“On her feet, like she was jumping.” He muttered. I breathed a sigh of relief, looking back to Dean.  
“Baby girl?” Dean said, shaking her shoulders now. She stirred, groggy at first, then the pain caught up and her eyes went wide. Her mouth falling open. Her scream came out as a faint hiss, choked off at the back of her throat. Dean looped his hands under her body and began to move as quickly as he could without jostling her too much.  
“Chaz, grab the guns, baby.” I said before sprinting towards the house. 

I grabbed the keys off the counter and bolted back out to the four-wheel drive. I roared it to life and gunned it across the field towards the edge of the woods where Dean was emerging with Mary. Chase, not far behind with the three guns. I grabbed them off him and threw them into the tray at the back, then pushed his tiny bum up the step into the front seat as Dean shuffled into the back seat with Mary. She was pale white, her skin had a sickly sheen to it. Once Dean’s leg was in I slammed the door and ran to the driver side, taking off before my door was closed.

“It’s a fracture.” The doctor reassured, I ran my hand over her forehead, smoothing back her hair. They’d put Mary out when they’d set the bone and cast it. Dean touched his forehead to Chase’s, a sign of relief. “She’s very lucky.” He continued, looking between the paint over my sternum to the splatters on Dean and Chase. “What was she doing that high up a tree at six am?” Dean and I shared a look.  
“Kids.” I said before Chase could paint the nice man a picture. The doctor nodded as if the answer I gave was the answer for everything.  
“She’s got to the cast for a month, keep it dry, the nurse will show you how. And don’t let her scratch inside it with anything.” He added as an afterthought, before leaving us with her.  
“Can I sign it?” Chase asked. Dean and I chuckled. Relief washing over us.

***

Mary was turning eleven in a week and Chase had just turned eight. A lot had happened since. Sam had cut himself off from hunting all together, married Alexis and the twins were now four. Cas had formed a foundation to help the homeless, and was doing rather well, popping in when he could. Dean owned the mechanic’s store in town and with help from Jodie and Donna, I was a part time Sergeant at the local police office.  
“What?” Dean called from the garage. I followed his voice and found him, bowed legs splayed, sticking out from under the Impala. I reached down, took his half empty beer, taking a few gulps and stood over him.  
“You picking them up?” I asked, wheeling him out from under his baby. He looked up at me, his face had a few grease smudges across it and the wrinkles he’d acquired with age made him even sexier. He grabbed the backs of my knees and I collapsed onto him. He hummed, his chest vibrating with the sound. Even all these years later, he still made me ache for him, just a moan from him could light my fire. Dean’s hands wandered from my hips up to my arms, encouraging me down to him.  
“We don’t have time.” I said, reaching for the button and zipper to his jeans.  
“You’re right, they’ll be out of school in twenty minutes.” He whispered into my mouth as I began to kiss him.  
“Twenty minutes…” I echoed. Sorry kids, we were going to be late.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My next chapter begins with Dean dealing/helping Mary through a tough night - she gets her first period and the topic gets covered in detail. So skip through till you see the stars if you don't want to read that part, you won't have missed anything, just amazing Daddy!Dean!


	3. Responsibility with Dean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first part of this is Mary trying to deal with getting her period for the first time, Dean helping his daughter ... as much as a Dad can.  
> If you don't want to read this, scroll through to the first stars you come across.

A crash echoed through the house. Chase sat bolt upright in his bed. The glowing alarm clock read 3am. He grabbed the holy salt spray from his bedside table and crept to his door. Opening it slowly and cautiously stepping out. Dean was at the other end of the hall, holding an angel blade, having just come out of his room. They looked at each other before both noticing the light coming from under the bathroom door. Chase raised one foot slowly and placed it down in front of the other. Moving down the hall towards it. There was another noise, frantic, like someone searching through the cabinets. Mary’s door was still closed. Chase reached the bathroom door at the same time as Dean. Dean looked at his son, calm and ready eyes looked back. He nodded once and swung the door open.

“GET OUT!” Mary screamed. All three of them were in shock. Dean had flung the door open to reveal Mary in her underwear and pajama top, a blood trickle down her leg, red staining her pants. Luckily Chase had been behind Dean and hadn’t seen a thing. He was surprised by the intensity of her scream and Dean almost falling over him to close the door. Mary was mortified. She had woken in the middle of the night to an odd sensation. Her abdomen felt heavy and her pants were stuck to her thighs, her underwear wet. She’d waddled to the bathroom and had discovered she’d got her period for the first time. They’d had a class or two at school about puberty and what it does to each sex, her mom had even discussed it with her but she didn’t think at twelve she’d have to worry. She wasn’t even a teen yet. But here it was and she had to deal with it. She’d made a makeshift pad out of toilet paper as she searched through the cupboards and cabinets for pads. Hoping her mom kept a spare in here and not just in her and Dad’s ensuite.

“Sweetheart?” Dean tried, his head close to the door.  
“Go away!” She yelled from the other side. Dean stepped back and realized Chase was still there. Dean patted his shoulder and sent him back to bed.  
“You sure, Dad? Girls can be worse than demons.” Chase joked. Dean realized now was the time to correct that line of thought.  
“Chaz, girls might be scary. But they’re the ones, at the end of the day, that are stronger than us men. I want you to remember that.” He said, a heavy hand on his son’s shoulder, serious eyes piercing his son’s. Chase knew when Dean was being serious, and this was one of those times. He nodded and made for his room. Once his door was closed, Dean tried again. “Baby? What do you need? Let me help.” He hushed, wishing Pip was here.  
“I want mom.” She replied. She sounded upset and it broke Dean’s heart to hear her like that and know he couldn’t fix it.  
“She’s at work.” Dean said. There was no response. Dean then had a thought. He went into his room and to the ensuite, pulling open Pip’s cupboard. On the bottom shelf was a plastic storage box that Pip had arranged her pads and tampons into. Dean grabbed the whole box, not knowing what, if any, were suitable for Mary. He hurried back to the door and knocked. She didn’t say anything.

“I think I’ve found what you were after.” He muttered. He heard her come close to the door. He was probably just as embarrassed as she was, if not more so. He knew his cheeks had gone red and he was trying not to think about what he’d just seen. The door handle jiggled. Dean positioned himself so as to give the effect of privacy when she opened the door. She cracked it and peered out. Dean’s hands held the box in front of her, but he was on the other side of the jamb. She snatched the container off him and slammed the door.  
He slumped down and waited. There was the usual rip and tear that he’d hear with Pip, but then there was a small groan.  
“Everything alright darlin’?” He hushed.  
“I…” She started, too embarrassed to continue. Mary was sitting on the toilet, looking at her pajama pants that were stained and her underwear. She hadn’t brought any fresh clothes in with her. She was horrified by the thought of asking her dad. “I just want mom.” She whispered. Dean’s hearing wasn’t entirely shot from all the years of abuse to his eardrums. He heard her plea.  
“I know baby, but it’s just you and me at the moment.” He answered. Mary looked at the door and back to the pile on the floor, the already peeled open pad. “What do you need?” Her dads voice floated through the door. A tear slid down her cheek. Why did it have to come now? Why did mum have to work weird hours? Why did her body have to betray her? Why did Dad have to burst in? Why did she have to be a woman? She wasn’t ready. All these thoughts floated through her mind, her tears coming in a thick stream now. She wiped at them furiously and stuttered a long breath in through the sobs.  
“I need clothes.” She whispered. Dean was about to ask her why when the light bulb flicked on in his brain. He stood up from where he’d been sitting and went to her room. He’d never gone through her things before, he valued the privacy he gave his children. He found himself worrying about opening the first draw he laid his hands on, what would he find? He sighed at his own stupid thoughts and opened it. He did their washing; he knew what she wore. He pulled out a pair of white underwear and set about in search of pajama bottoms. As he went to leave her room he looked at the panties he was holding. White. He groaned at his obliviousness and went back, snatching up a pair of black ones instead. He knocked on the door again, but she didn’t come to open it. “Everything ok?” He asked through the door. Then he heard a deep breath in, the little hiccough audible from the crying. It tore his heart in two. He put his hand on the handle but stopped himself, he couldn’t burst in again. He tapped faintly, instead.  
“Can you just slide them to me?” She asked, another hiccough giving her away. Dean cracked the door and slid the garments across the tiles and closed the door again. He’d had to help Pip with things like this when she was heavily pregnant with Mary, but it was all normal, he was in awe of his wife’s body and the way it was changing. And on top of that he was amazed at the amount of stuff a woman needs. But this was his baby girl, he remembered, like it was yesterday, her cuddled on his chest as he lay on the couch watching a movie. Now she was developing into a woman. Time was passing too quickly and there was no way for him to stop it.  
The door pulled open and out stepped Mary. Her shoulders were hunched, her cheeks were splotchy and wet from crying and her eyes were bloodshot.  
He pulled her into a hug and she began to sob against his chest. He opened his mouth to say something but, what do you say? Instead he stroked her hair and held her till she pulled away, sniffing.  
“What do I do with these?” She asked, holding a balled up towel, he guessed she’d wrapped her pants in.  
“Come on.” He said, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her towards the laundry. She demanded she could do it herself. So after she’d set everything to soak she came joined him in the kitchen.

“Warm milk, chocolate, pain killers.” Dean said, pointing at the things laid in front of him on the bench.  
“What for?” Mary asked, her voice was still thick from crying.  
“It helps mom?” He shrugged. He didn’t understand. He was doing his best to fill her shoes in her temporary absence. Mary gave him a lopsided smile, the same one he sometimes sported, and took a sip of the milk before tossing back the small tablet. She sat down on the stool, noting the weird feeling of the fresh pad, and snapped the stick of chocolate, offering her dad half. He raised an eyebrow. Clearly mom never did this! He took it and munched down as she did.  
“Dad?” She muttered. He hummed a response, looking into her green eyes. “Thanks.” She said looking down, her hair falling over her face. Dean reached over and pushed it behind her ear.  
“I’m sorry mom wasn’t here.” He answered.  
“S’ok.” She murmured, shrugging. There was a moments silence from Dean, she looked up at him to see what was keeping him quiet.  
“You’re are an amazing, smart and beautiful young lady.” He said, a proud smile stretching across his face, his eyes beginning to swim. She finished her milk and rolled her eyes, lifting herself off the stool. Dean rounded the bench and pulled her into another hug before leading her out of the kitchen and flicking off the lights.

I arrived home at five am. The overnight shifts were the worst, nothing happened in our pokey town, and trust me that’s the way I liked it, but it meant time slowed to a crawl. I shed my uniform in the laundry, dabbing at the coffee spill. As I went to soak them I saw Mary’s pants in the bucket. I sighed, knowing exactly what I’d missed. The poor thing. I forgot about my uniform and went into our bedroom. Dean was asleep, his face so smooth and calm. I pulled on my pajamas and padded back out and down to Mary’s room, cracking the door.  
“Momma?” She murmured, still half asleep.  
“Hey Maymay.” I whispered, approaching her bed. “You ok?” I asked, sitting on the side of her bed and brushing my fingers over her cheek. She hummed but was asleep again before getting a chance to answer. I leant in and kissed her forehead. Closing her door and finding my way back to Dean. Lifting the sheets and climbing in, he stirred, rolling over and wrapping an arm around me. He pulled me flush against him, my back to his front.  
“Hell of a night.” He muttered into my ear. I hummed questioningly. “Chase might be needing the talk.” I could tell his eyes were still closed and he was on the verge of sleep.  
“Shot not.” I whispered back, his arms tightened for a moment in response, before he was back to dreaming.

***

“MOM!” Mary screamed from her bedroom. I flew down the hallway, the knife I had been chopping with, still firmly in hand. I swung around the door frame into her room, knife at the ready. She was wrestling with Chase, he had her diary. When they saw me, Chase dropped the diary and she snatched it back, both breaking apart immediately.  
“Sorry Mom.” Chase said quickly. My heart was hammering. Even at fifteen and twelve, they were still a handful.  
“Guys…” I panted. “I’m too old for this shit!” We all swore, there was no use in hiding it, but they had manners enough to leave those words at home.  
“Kids?” Dean called, stomping up the hall. He joined us in Mary’s room.  
“Chaz was reading my diary.” Mary blurted upon his arrival.  
“Chase, cut it out. Ain’t nothing in there for you.” Dean rounded on Chase, he physically shrunk back, then Dean turned to our daughter, “Mary, stop leaving it lying around, use the lock box.” Dean barked. They both lowered their heads.  
“Sorry sir.” Chase muttered. It broke my heart to hear him call his father sir. And it apparently had the same effect on Dean.  
“Hey.” Dean hushed, grabbing his son’s shoulder, dropping to his knee. “I’m no sir.” Dean brought Chase into a hug. Chase wrapped his arms around Dean’s shoulders, tucking his head into his neck.  
Dean had told me about his father and the way he raised the boys, how they called him sir and there wasn’t enough affection. He raised Sam and in return, didn’t get much of a childhood. So he made sure the kids got theirs.

\---

“Dad! I’m sixteen!” Mary whined. She’d been smart enough to let me meet him as I dropped her at the movies. He seemed nice enough, but when I got home, I grabbed my laptop and looked him up, using the data base at work. I also searched his parents, any close friends, cousins… I may have been overreacting, but anything I did would be small compared to Dean.  
“And? He’s a boy. I was sixteen once. I know how they think!” Dean answered. I smiled at Alexis, rolling my eyes. Hers went wide as Sam entered the room again, a shot gun in hand. Chase and the twins had been laughing, but this was a new high.  
“SAM!” Alexis scolded over the top of their feeding baby’s head. That’s right, they had identical nine-year-old boys and a two-year-old girl. Sam was wearing a smirk, and had only meant to rile Dean up more.  
“Oh my god!” Mary groaned, she covered her face and turned to retreat from the kitchen. The hub of all our entertainment.  
“Ok. Ok!” I chuckled, breaking it up, I caught her and whirled her to stand in front of me, rubbing her arms. “We’ll say a quick hello and let you go.” Dean opened his mouth to protest, but I silenced him with one of my fierce looks. Sam placed the shotgun on the bench, smirk still in place. He often came over for weekends, after spending more than half of his life always with Dean, it was hard for both of them to go too long without the other.  
“Thank you, Mom!” Mary sighed. As she broke from my grip, trying to leave to get ready, the doorbell went. Dean’s comedic timing was still at its best, he snatched up the shotgun and pumped it. I threw him a look as Mary whined mom, the rest of the family falling into giggles. Mary left the room and disappeared out to the entrance. We heard the door open, close, the gentle murmur of voices. As their footsteps came up the hall, I quickly took the shotgun off Dean and stored it behind the bench as they entered. A mix of relief, at the sight of no shotgun, and exasperation played across her face. He followed her in, holding flowers in one hand, letting hers go as they came through the doorway.  
“Dad, this is West.” She introduced. He was very polite and didn’t falter as Dean glowered at him. He extended his hand and Dean took it, crushing it as he shook.  
“This is Uncle Sam, Aunt Lexi,” She said, gesturing around the room, “You’ve met Mom,” This was news to Dean, I knew I’d be subject to his annoyance later, “Chase, Shep and Tom you know from school.” She finished. He smiled at everyone as she said their names.  
“It’s nice to meet you all. These are for you, Missus Winchester.” He said, holding out the bouquet. I propped the shotgun in the corner and made my way around the bench, taking them from him.  
“Pip, please!” I corrected, “Thank you West, that’s very kind.” I said, shoving the flowers at Dean who was still puffed up, shoulders broader than usual.  
“You two have a good night.” Alexis said, giving Mary the all clear to leave. I followed them out to the door, holding it for them. West gave her the keys to his car as they walked out. She was racing down the path as I stopped him.  
“Yes, Missus Winchester?” He said, turning. I stood close to him and lowered my voice.  
“If you so much as look at her funny… I will bury you.” I breathed through gritted teeth.  
“Ex-excuse me?” He said, unsure of what he’d heard.  
“I will chop you into tiny pieces and scatter you in the woods.” I whispered next to his ear. His eyes went wide, the colour fading from his face. He turned slowly, stumbling over his feet as he headed toward the mustang Mary was loudly revving. “You kids have fun!” I called, following him at a distance. Dean and Sam joined me, waving them off.  
“Have her back by twelve!” Dean called, he made it sound like a threat. Sam’s biceps bulged as he waved, a reason to be intimidated. Mary waved and gunned it. The sleek, red, mustang fish-tailed as it took off, speeding down the road. She’d gained our shared thrill for speed. I looked at the boys as we turned to head back inside.  
“Did you see his face?” Sam asked, snickering.  
“He totally expected you to say something!” I laughed, punching at Dean’s shoulder.  
“That kid will be terrified to even sit next to her.” Dean chuckled.  
“Poor kid.” I sighed, “He had no clue!”  
Alexis didn’t need to be there in order to know what had happened. She was standing, a hand on her hip. Her look shot us all down. As the youngest adult in the room, she had a presence that made us feel like little kids being told off.  
“If he breaks her heart, it’ll be on you three.” She scolded before collecting Jess, the toddler, and taking her into the next room for a nap.

“You still awake?” Dean murmured into the darkness of our room. I wriggled from my back on to my side, facing him.  
“Yep. What’s the time?” I whispered, as though she could all of a sudden arrive and hear us. Dean turned his head away from me then rolled back and onto his side.  
“Almost twelve.” His breath was soft and warm against my face, though his tone was concerned. I reached up to cup his stubble covered jaw, his chest rumbled in response.  
“She’ll be home soon.” I reassured, running my thumb over his bottom lip. He caught it in a small kiss. I smiled into the dark and guided his face to mine.  
“I give him another fifteen, then I’m hunting him down.” Dean said.  
“Not without me.” I chuckled before kissing him again. He sighed into the kiss and pulled me closer to him. Then we heard the telltale rumble of an engine, gliding to a stop outside. Dean sat up, ears pricked and listening. It idled before two car doors slammed, followed by a murmur of hushed voices.  
“I had a great night.” We heard Mary say. West mumbled his reply and then there was a silence, long enough for a romantic kiss goodnight. I could feel Dean’s muscles react to the idea of this boy in close proximity to our daughter. I put a calming hand on his shoulder.  
“Night!” West finally said, his voice husky. I smiled at the memory of when Dean sounded like that after our first date. The car door slammed, then our front door opened.  
“Home. Safe and sound.” I breathed against Dean’s bicep, pulling him back down to the pillow. He leaned over and kissed me goodnight before settling into his pillow. I smiled at him and rolled back onto my other side, he rolled with me, pulling me flush against his warm body, his arm around my waist. Soon his breath had slowed, his muscles relaxing. Dean was fast at falling asleep, we joked that he was making up for lost dreams. Our door clicked open then, I could hear Mary creep around to my side. I extended an arm out to her to show I was awake without scaring the wits out of her.  
“I didn’t wake you, did I?” She whispered, taking my hand and crouching beside the bed, her face at my level.  
“No Maymay, what is it?” I hushed back, drawing circles with my thumb over her hand.  
“Nothing…” She said, but she didn’t move. I could feel the buzz coming off her. The excitement of a date. I waited for her to speak again and she did, “It was so wonderful, Mom. He was so…” She trailed off. I reached back and tapped Dean’s hip. And like many nights, when the kids were much younger, he shuffled over to his side, pulling me with him. I flicked back the sheets for Mary. She stayed on the ground a moment longer, weighing up whether she was too grown up for this. But then she climbed in. Her cold toes dug under my legs as she finally stilled, lying on her side, inches from me.  
“We kissed.” She breathed. I could hear the exhilaration in her voice. I could picture her face; eyebrows raised, cheeks glowing a bright red, eyes wide and happy.  
“Good kisser?” I asked.  
“The best.” She answered.  
“Who are you comparing him to?” I teased. Mary chuckled quietly before burying her face under my chin. I wrapped an arm over her and pulled her against me. She was growing up so fast, I savoured moments like this, though. She’d always be our baby. And, as though he could hear my thoughts, Deans arm lifted from my waist and extended over Mary.

\---

“Mary, breakfast, school!” I called out. Dean kissed my cheek as he took my last slice of toast. I smacked hard at his ass as he passed. He turned back and pulled me into him, crushing his lips to mine, his hand creeping down to squeeze my ass.  
“Ughh! Mom, Dad!” Chase groaned from the bench. Dean pulled back, giving me a final kiss before rounding the table and kissing Chase’s hair and ruffling it. He passed Mary at the door, pecking her temple before leaving for the day.  
“I love you all!” He called from the door.  
“Have a good day, pumpkin.” I called back over the top of Mary.  
“It’s so early!” Mary groaned, pulling herself on to a stool.  
“No earlier than yesterday and Monday and last Friday…” I said, smiling at her, she knew I could go on and she put her hand up to stop me.  
“Alright, alright, I get it!” Mary whinged. I shifted my gaze to Chase, he was studying one of the Men of Letter’s lore books.  
Though we’d all tried to get out of the hunting life, we couldn’t help but keep an ear to the ground for anything coming our way. And unfortunately we’d had to teach the kids about all the nasties when they were much younger, after a family run in. Luckily Mary didn’t find it at all interesting these days, instead she’d been all consumed in West for the past year. At seventeen she was beginning to scare me more than any monster out there. Chase was wrapped up in any super natural stories he could find. He’d even found a few cases. Dean and I tried to discourage him but as a fourteen-year-old with the world at his fingertips, there wasn’t much we could do but make sure he kept telling us and didn’t get any silly ideas about hunting one himself.  
“Chaz, why don’t you put the book away?” I said, sliding a stack of pancakes between them. Mary helped herself to three, clearly she had her fathers’ appetite. Chase closed the book, marking the page.  
“I found something.” Chase murmured, sliding a pancake onto his own plate. I raised an eyebrow and hummed while swallowing my mouthful of coffee.  
“What’d you find, baby?” I asked, encouraging his honesty.  
“There’s a case in Lawrence, I think it’s a demon, but I can’t be sure.” He pushed his glasses up his nose and looked up shyly.  
“Lawrence, Kansas?” I asked, the name rang a bell but I wasn’t sure why.  
“Yea, I think it’s a rogue cross roads demon.” He said through a mouthful. I nodded, suddenly it came to me. Dean and Sam’s mother was killed by a demon in Lawrence. I ripped off the apron I had on and wiped my hands on my uniform.  
“How sure?” I asked him before reaching into the top cupboard for the angel blade we kept at the back.  
“Uhh…” Chase stammered, watching me.  
“Mom?” Mary questioned, holding her butter knife so tightly her knuckles were white against the taught skin.  
“Let’s go. Bags. Car. Now.” I ordered, shoving the blade into a belt loop.  
“Mom!” Mary yelled, catching my arm. “We’re coming.” She said, Chase nodding in confirmation.  
“No. You two have school!” I ushered them towards the door. Unfortunately, Dean and I were stubborn and had passed this down in double to our children.  
“We. Are. Coming.” Mary insisted. I didn’t pause as I pushed them out the door. Mary had proved a skilled hunter, but I wasn’t risking this. It sent shivers down my spine to think it was Lawrence and a demon. I sped off in the four-wheel drive. It was quiet in the back, too quiet.  
“What are you two planning?” I glared at them both in the rear vision mirror.  
“We’re texting Dad.” Chase said calmly. I was fuming, those cheeky children. There was nothing I could do, if they had hit send it was too late, if they hadn’t the only way to coax them out of sending it was to take them. And that was most definitely not happening. My phone buzzed in the well between the two seats. I ignored it and pulled up to the school.  
“Right. You two. Out!” I barked.  
“Mom…” Mary tried.  
“No.” I was firm and she gave up.  
“Be safe.” Chase offered, it was enough to melt my heart.  
“I love you both.” I cooed at them, waving my arm out the window at them. Chase came in and gave my cheek a peck.  
“Love you too, mom.” He whispered against my ear, I ran my hand through his hair and across his cheek as he stepped back.  
“Mary…” I pleaded. She stood defiantly on the curb, arms crossed. She reminded me so much of me when I’d first met Dean.  
“It’s not fair.” She whined, finally giving in and coming to the window. She hugged me tight and whispered into my hair. “Be strong, Momma.” It had been her phrase since the night Chase was born.  
“Keep an eye on Chaz.” I whispered back, kissing her cheek. “I’ll see you both tonight!” I said as Mary stepped back, I gunned it down the road and left them shrinking in the rear vision. I had done this once when they were much younger, Jodie had looked after them. Dean nearly crucified me back then, I could only imagine he’d be worse now.  
I called Dean back and pushed speaker, putting the phone in my lap.  
“You are not going to Lawrence.” Dean answered.  
“Yea babe, I am.” I replied, I could hear a rumble behind him, “Are you driving?” I asked, already suspicious.  
“What?” He said, his voice going high. Caught! “No baby, I’m at the shop.” Where he should’ve been working.  
“Yea, you are! Sam?” I accused, I knew if Dean was going to Lawrence, Sam would be riding shotgun. There was a long silence, everyone in our family knew it only went one way when I was on the other side of a silence; I’d win.  
“Hey Pippa, how you doing.” He tried to sweet talk.  
“Does Lexi know about this?” I spat at Sam.  
“Uhh…” Sam offered, I could almost imagine Dean shaking his head.  
“I’m calling her.” I threatened.  
“Alright! Yes, she does know. We’ve been following it for the past couple of days. She insisted I come along.” Sam said, giving in. I saw red.  
“DEAN!” I hollered. I didn’t need to see him to know he was shrinking in his seat. “You’re both in serious trouble.” I promised before jamming my finger on the button, ending the call.  
I reached over and flicked on the siren, flooring the accelerator and zooming down the highway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read the beginning, let me know how I did, my first period experience was very different to this, I was surrounded by supportive females - takes a village to raise a child, and all that.


	4. Hunting with Dean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is full of angst and a character death ... heads up!

“Baby, you shouldn’t be here!” Dean hushed, as I climbed out of the car.  
“You shouldn’t have come without me.” I chided. Sam chuckled. “And you,” I turned on the taller Winchester, “You should’ve called!” I stared him down, his smile quickly disappearing.  
“Dean made me promise.” He tried.  
“I get the same shit from my kids…” I said, leaving them as I straightened my uniform and headed towards the police station.  
“How’d she get here so fast?” Dean wondered to himself.  
“Cop car!” Sam said, now annoyed that he was in the dog house as well.

“Sheriff Winchester, heard about the nasty and came to lend a hand.” I greeted the town’s sheriff. He was clearly confused but could use all the help he could get.  
“Right, well… What do you know about this?” He said, laying out pictures on the desk in front of him. He waved me around the desk and I peered over his shoulder. Each victim had white hair, pale faces, each had their eyes open wide in terror.  
“Can I make copies, I’ll ask the suits?” I asked him, nodding out the glass door. He followed my gaze and quirked an eyebrow.  
“What do the feds want in this?” He asked.  
“Noisy pricks, they gotta get into anything interesting.” I offered, it seemed to do the trick and soon enough he was making me copies of the file.

“Here.” I said, flinging a file at Sam before climbing back up into the cab of my truck.  
“Hang on!” Dean said, holding my door open. “What did he say?” He asked, trying to hold me in place. I reached out for the door.  
“He hasn’t got a clue.” I snapped, ripping the door from his hands and slamming it. “Meet you at the Motel we drove past.” I called out the window, reversing out and swinging the pick-up around.

“Can I get two rooms? I’m expecting my partners to join me shortly.” I explained to the woman behind the motel counter.  
“What name?” She asked, passing me a clipboard to fill out.  
“Arendelle.” I answered. Since having the kids and watching all the Disney films on repeat, I’d given up trying to stick to the rocker names, instead it was any Disney reference that wasn’t too obvious.  
“Any relation to Weselton?” She said, raising an eyebrow. She clearly had kids obsessed with Frozen.  
“Two tall men?” I asked, confused at how they could’ve beat me.  
“No, two teens and a man in a trench coat.” Concern began to etch into her face. I frowned at her, then realization set in. My eyes widened.  
“What room?” I demanded. She looked down at the chart and held out my keys.  
“Seven.” She said. I snatched the two room keys from her and ran out. I counted the rooms as I sprinted past them. Five. Six… Seven. I beat my fist against the door and finally it cracked open. I pushed it but the chain was pulled across.  
“Pip?” Cas answered.  
“Castiel. Let me in. NOW!” I bellowed, losing any cool I had. The telltale roar of the Impala joined us outside the room. The door closed and Dean was quickly by my side.  
“What’s happening?” He said, ready for a monster on the other side of the door.  
“Our kids are here.” I growled between clenched teeth. The door opened again and I burst through it.  
“Mom?” Chase said, surprised.  
“Where is she?” I asked him. I knew it would’ve been Mary’s idea, and I should’ve recognized the red mustang in the parking lot as West’s.  
“She’s… uh…” He looked to Cas for help.  
“Chase.” Dean stepped in, his voice calmer than mine. I followed the flick of Chase’s eyes to the bathroom, and stormed towards it. I flung the door open and there she was. Her arms were folded tightly across her chest, her sassiest look yet. God it was like walking in to find a mirror of my younger self.  
“Come out here young lady.” I commanded. She raised an eyebrow and took one slow step out into the room. “What the fuck were you thinking?” I demanded.  
“You knew as soon as you drove away, I wasn’t just going to roll over.” She yelled back at me. I took a deep breath, my nostrils flaring. I raked my eyes over her and in that second, I realized; she was doing what she’d seen Dean and I do all her life. Fight for family, no matter the cost. I took a long slow breath in and let it out in a steady sigh, her muscles tightened at the coming onslaught, whatever it might be.  
“Well, now that you’re here…” I resigned, pulling her into a hug. She was shocked, so was everyone else. Her cold exterior melted and she lifted her arms up, squeezing me against her.  
“I’m sorry, Mom.” She whispered so as only I could hear.  
“No more secrets, alright?” I announced to the room as I let Mary go, Dean and Chase shook their heads in sync, Sam and Cas quickly followed. I eyed Mary and she nodded in agreement.

After a long afternoon of Cas and the kids studying and Sam, Dean and I visiting victim’s families we’d come to a rough conclusion. The demon was scaring people to death. But why we still didn’t know. There wasn’t anything strange about the victim’s; sudden change in luck, money, love interest, inheritance. All we had was a possible demon getting his rocks off on shock.  
“I thought it was a demon, but who’s to say it actually is?” Chase said quietly when we arrived back at the room. I went over to him and kissed his head, he was the shiest of all of us, Dean and I couldn’t quite figure out where he’d picked up that trait as we were both as rambunctious as we were stubborn.  
“Look,” Mary said, swinging the police files towards us, “There’s a pinprick behind each ear.” She said, pointing at the coroner’s report and the photo.  
“So it’s feeding on brains?” Dean said, eyebrows high.  
“Or a specific part of the brain.” Sam said, sitting and opening his laptop.  
“They could be feeding on the amygdala.” Chase started, gaining everyone’s attention he continued, “The sudden increase of Cortisol, the push of adrenaline, the heightened glucose levels…” Chase pushed his glasses back up his nose, the slightest pink settled on the apples of his cheeks that rose when he smiled.  
“Smartest person I know.” Dean crowed, Mary shot him a look that mirrored mine and Sam’s. Chase shrugged under my hands.  
“I don’t know, Uncle Sam’s got the brains.” Chase tried to push the attention off him.  
Mary and I snorted, Sam just looked pleased with himself, but we all knew what Chase was doing and he wasn’t gonna get off that easy.  
“Nah, dude. You’re the brains in this family.” Sam sung, turning his dimpled smile on Chase. Mary nodded in agreement, pushing his arm hard enough that Chase rocked and rubbed at the spot.  
“Good work.” She chimed. I kissed the top of his head and lowered my lips to his ear.  
“Got it all from me!” I whispered. He chuckled lightly at my comment and swung his arms up, holding me down to him for an awkward hug.

The victims seemed to all live separate and single lives away from large families. After this information came to light, Sam and Chase halved the hacking duties and set out to see if anyone else in the town came from large families but lived alone. Thirty.  
We then narrowed that down, crossing off anyone with significant others who had unofficially moved in; Chase’s expertise in hacking into social media was both impressive and terrifying. We managed to get the list down to ten. Between us that left eight.  
“Six.” Cas corrected. I raised an eyebrow.  
“No, eight. These two aren’t going off on their own.” I clarified, nodding at the kids.  
“Mom! I’m almost eighteen, Chaz is-”  
“Leave me out of it.” Chase interrupted from the table next to Sam.  
“Well, anyway. I’ve got West’s car…” She said, as if that made a difference.  
“And?” Dean said, finally joining the conversation.  
“I…” She seemed to be at a loss for words under her father’s stern look. “Dad!” She whined.  
“Not happening. Next.” Dean said, a tone of finality. Amazingly, Mary dropped the subject.  
“I’ve got it down to five.” Sam announced from behind his laptop.  
“HA!” Mary blurted into mine and Dean’s faces. We both gave her a dry look and the smile quickly fell from her face and she rounded the table to stand behind Sam who was now telling Chase how he narrowed it down again.  
“I can keep an ear out for her.” Cas quietly offered to Dean. I clapped Cas on the shoulder in a thanks and left the two best-friends to talk it out.  
“You must be hungry, huh?” I asked Chase.  
“Oh yea!” Sam said, leaning back and circling an arm around Mary when we bumped into her while stretching. I shot him a look and turned back to Chase.  
“Yea, I s’pose. Can I go with Uncle Sam tonight?” He asked, I buried the rejection at the question.  
“If it’s ok with Uncle Sam, of course!” I said, silently hoping that Sam would turn him down.  
“Of course it is, be happy to have this one riding shot gun!” Sam replied, of course Sam wouldn’t turn him down. These two kids were a big part of his life. Although he had his own family, it didn’t change him being an amazing Uncle to our two. 

“If you see anything, call and wait.” I reiterated to Mary as she dropped me outside the house I was to watch. I collected my bag and waited for her response.  
“Yeah, ok.” She said dismissively, revving slightly.  
“Mary.” I cautioned, I needed to hear her mean it.  
“Promise.” I kissed her cheek and opened the door. “Mom?” Her voice softer than before. I climbed out, closed the door and looked through the open window.  
“Be strong.” She said with a smile. I reached through the window and cupped her cheek with my hand.  
“Be brave.” I reclaimed my hand and stood back, with one last look she roared the engine and took off.

The home of Ana Pendergast, the woman I would spend the night watching, was a one storey with a path and high fence running down the side. I looked around for prying eyes before I ran across the road and down the side path. I hadn’t thought this through when I’d given my truck over to Sam and Chaz. I found a patchy shrub in the backyard and crawled under. I pulled out the thermos of coffee and settled in for the long night ahead. 

***

It must’ve been midnight when Ana turned out her lights and plunged me into darkness and it was two a.m. when my phone lit up with Mary’s picture. I answered it immediately.  
“Either this dude has a friend coming over, or something’s happening.” Her voice was a whisper.  
“Stay there. I’m on my way. Call Dad.” I whispered back and hung up. I burst through the bushes, I couldn’t care if I woke Ana up or if neighbor’s heard. I hoisted my bag further over my shoulder and started sprinting in the direction Mary had driven. I brought up the map Chaz had loaded onto my phone that had each of us marked out. I sprinted till my lungs hurt. I rounded the next corner and there was West’s car. It was empty. My stomach sunk. My truck was parked diagonally out the front but no sign of Baby. I flung my bag toward the red mustang and ran across the road.

“Mary. Chase.” I hissed as I reached the door to the apartment. The open door. The door with a broken lock. I pulled my gun, loaded with marked bullets, and nudged the door wider. As soon as I was inside I found the man Mary had been watching; his hair was white, eyes wide, skin pale. My heart beat harder in response. Then I got sight of another foot behind the couch. Sam was lying on the ground, face down, a groan slipped past my lips as I reached down to feel for a pulse. Faint, but there.  
“Mary? Chase?” I hissed louder, frantic to find them. I quickly swept the kitchen and upon finding it empty I turned. In the lounge room, the room I’d just come from, Mary was being held by a man with black eyes. She was flush to his body, a knife at her throat, she was on her tiptoes as the blade was held tight and high against her skin.  
“Let her go.” I demanded, training my gun on the demon’s head. He moved back behind Mary, she was blocking any shot I had.  
“You can’t do anything.” The demon purred. Mary shivered with the breath on the back of her neck.  
“It’s ok, baby. Be brave.” I said to Mary before turning my attention back to the demon, “Where’s Chase?” I demanded.  
“Uh, uh. Be patient.” The demon teased.  
“Take me. Let them go.” I was surprised at how calm my voice was.  
“Mom, no!” Mary whimpered, I nodded at her but kept my eyes fixed on his.  
“Hmm…” He hummed, “Let me think about that.” He mocked, looking into the distance for a second, “I’d rather do this.” He dug the knife into Mary’s throat, blood began to weep down her neck. Mary’s breath hitched, her eyes instantly went wide, her body went ridged. I rushed forward and froze when he tutted, my hand with the gun had lowered.  
“Stop! Please!” I begged, all traces of calm gone.  
“You scared she’ll die in front of your eyes. Scared you won’t be able to do anything to save your precious daughter?” The demon watched me intently as my eyes began to water, then he drove the knife deeper and Mary began to splutter, her fingers trying to apply pressure to the wound, but the blood was spurting and gushing.  
“MARY!” I screamed, rushing forward. The demon let her go and disappeared. I caught her convulsing body. She was choking on her own blood, her eyes rolling but still trying to find mine. I grabbed her hand that was reaching for me, pulling her further into my lap.  
“Be brave baby. Chuck will come for you. Be brave. I’ll see you again. I love you.” I cooed as I rocked her now lifeless body, her hand had gone limp in mine. There was a garbled noise a foot from me and I spun, gun at the ready.  
The demon was back, this time he had Chase, his glasses were missing and he looked terrified. I stood, training my gun as best I could with shaking hands, on the peak of the demon’s head.  
“Let him go.” I barked.  
“Make me.” The demon enticed. I pulled the trigger, sure of my shot. But somehow Chase was the one falling.  
“No!” I screamed, once again I launched forward, clutching his lifeless body. Sobs wracked my body as true terror began to sink in. Not my babies. I couldn’t live without them. What would Dean say? What would he do? What had I done?  
The demon hovered over me. My heart hammered, my brain was screaming at me to run but I couldn’t not without my children. The demon tilted my head and there was a sharp pinch behind my ear.  
Once the needle was in the children’s bodies disappeared. My eyes widened in realization.  
They hadn’t really been there. They hadn’t died.

“Mary? Where’s your mother, I got a text?” Dean said as Mary wound down her window.  
“She should be at the other house.” Mary replied, confused as to why her Dad was checking up on her, Dean showed Mary the text.  
“I… She…” Mary couldn’t form words, Dean knew this was bad, a shiver wound it’s way up his spine, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.  
“Have you been here the whole time?” He barked.  
“I went to the toilet ten minutes ago, but yes.” She said, not wanting to believe that maybe something had happened to her mother as she was taking a break. Dean was already rounding her car, then saw his wife’s bag against Mary’s wheel. He took off running towards the apartment.  
“Call Sam.” He ordered over his shoulder. Mary climbed out of her car and followed her father, bringing her phone to her ear.  
“Uncle Sam… something’s happened to Mom, get here quick.” She said when the phone was answered.  
Meanwhile Dean was praying with all his might to his best friend. Cas met him at the top of the stairs.  
“What is it Dean?” He said as Dean reached him.  
“Pip’s been lured in, I think she’s…” He couldn’t finish the sentence, instead he kept running until he reached the open door. The apartment owner was on the floor, white hair and a look of shock on his face. Cas went to him and pressed his fingers into her neck, no pulse, he looked to Dean and shook his head.  
“Pip?” Dean called, there was no reply. “Phillipa!” He yelled, still nothing.  
“I’ll check the bedroom.” Cas offered as Mary ran through the door. Dean held up a hand to her, stopping her in her tracks, she instinctively raised her blade in preparation for a fight. Dean moved past his daughter and into the kitchen. There was Pip’s body, white hair, shocked look, he collapsed next to her body, dropping the blade, forgetting the hunt for the demon.  
“No, Pip.” He groaned, pulling her into his arms and onto his legs, he pressed his fingers into her neck, there was no pulse, no sign of life. He shook her all the same, hoping that she’d suddenly take a breath.  
“Dad?” Came Mary’s soft voice, when she rounded the corner and saw her father cradling her mother’s lifeless body, her whole being froze. Then she saw it, a flicker of movement just behind her father in the shadows, the demon stepped out, a long needle in hand.  
“Dad!” Mary shouted, the demon looked up surprised, Mary launched over her unresponsive father and caught the demon in her arms. The force of her sent them flying back into the wall, she grappled with him, the sheer will to protect her father, to seek vengeance for her mother, the guilt that tore through her body, helping her win out. She jammed the blade into the Demon’s heart, the smile fell from the demon’s lips as his face lit up with his slaughter. Mary twisted the blade for good measure and then crawled off him, shoving the body away, she crawled over to her parents.  
“Mom.” She sobbed, “Mommy!” She shook her mother’s body, her movements waking Dean from his catatonic state, he looked down at his daughter and around at the dead demon. Tears poured from his eyes, cascading over his cheeks like a waterfall.  
“Mary.” He whispered, pulling her into his side, she almost refused to be coddled but gave in and wept into his jacket. Cas came to the kitchen door, freezing at what lay before him.  
“Do something.” Dean pleaded, looking up to Cas. He immediately dropped to a knee and held a hand over her chest, the other to her forehead.  
“I can’t Dean.” He breathed, “She’s…” He didn’t finish the sentence for the look of utter loss on Dean’s face silenced him. Sam and Chase thundered into the apartment, rounding the corner. Cas quickly shuffled out of the way. Chase took one look at the group and his knees buckled, his lips pulled down as his eyes began a steady stream of salty water.  
“Mom.” He choked, Dean reached out and pulled his son to him by the arm, sliding him across the linoleum floor.  
Sam watched as his brother, his family, wept for the loss of his best friend. He ran his hands over his face, trying to wipe off the grief.  
“What happened?” He asked Cas, after taking a long breath to steady himself, though it didn’t help as tears angrily pricked at his eyes. Cas shook his head and gave a limp shrug.  
“Dean.” Sam whispered, his brother didn’t look up, instead he clutched his two sobbing children, tighter to his side.  
“Dean, we gotta go before…” Sam didn’t finish, the anger on Dean’s face said it all.  
Deep down Dean knew his brother was right, they had to go before the neighbor’s woke up and discovered the door kicked in, the tenant dead on the rug, but he couldn’t calm himself to think straight. Sam stepped around everyone and kneeled next to Pip’s body, trying to take her from Dean’s grip.  
“Come on, we gotta go.” Sam tried again, the only one aware in this moment. Sam tugged at her again and Dean let him take her. Sam picked her up, her head lulled over his arm and her hands dangled and dropped. Dean helped his children to stand, pulling them up and under his arms. They followed Sam out of the apartment and down to the cars. Cas stayed behind to clean up, wiping away any trace that they had ever been there.


	5. Healing with Dean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It gets a little tricky here, try to keep up - apologies if it's all over the place.

“I need that body.” Crowley said from behind everyone. They were all gathered around the pyre, Pip’s body wrapped in sheets, laid on top of the logs that Dean was about to torch. They all turned at the sound of his voice.  
“Excuse me?” Dean growled. Mary vibrating with anger at his side, Chase’s red rimmed eyes were blank, expressionless. Sam’s frame had hardened and was rigid at the company of Crowley, Cas took a protective step forward.

“I need her.” Crowley repeated.  
“I don’t think so.” Mary bit out, her jaw clenched so tight the words became one, Dean put out a cautioning arm, holding her back from charging at him.  
“Have it your way, then.” Crowley sighed, holding his hand outstretched to Pip’s body. Suddenly there was a rasp of breath coming from atop the pyre. They all spun in surprise as the wrapped body sat up. Dean stood wary as Chase was the first one to run up and tear down the logs in order to get to his mother. He snapped out his swiss-army knife and cut away at the material, binding her.  
“Chase!” Dean barked in warning but his son didn’t listen, his actions ever more frantic. Dean seemed to be frozen to the spot, unable to stop his son, unable to help.  
“Mom?” Chase called, all the while peeling the fabric away from her face and body. Finally enough of her was free from the tangle and she clawed her arms out, Chase, pulling the last bit away from her face.  
“Chase?” She questioned, looking at her son. He threw his arms around her neck as she enveloped him in a half hug, still bound by the sheet, “Aww, baby.” Mary was next up the pyre and into her mother’s arms, ignoring her father’s attempt to grab her.  
“Kids.” Dean tried again, but the authoritative tone was gone, he so desperately wanted to believe this was his wife, his Pip come back. But he’d been doing this his whole life, he knew it wasn’t possible, it didn’t work like this.  
“Cas?” Sam questioned, turning to the stunned Angel.  
“I don’t know.” Cas lied, not taking his eyes of Pip.  
“How?” Dean asked, turning back to Crowley, discovering he’d already vanished.

Mary helped me out of my confines, and Sam helped me down from the pyre, bringing me into a tight hug, but Dean and Cas were both stand offish.  
I held my arms wide for my husband, Mary’s hand on the small of my back, Chaz’s arms locked around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder. Sam was still standing close from a big welcoming hug.  
“Baby?” I asked, dropping my arms and wrapping them around Mary’s and Chaz’s shoulders, noticing Dean wasn’t making a move, his eyes were raking me over trying to figure it out.  
“You’re not Pip, you’re not my wife.” Dean murmured, getting a little louder, more confident, “Not their mother.” His words hurt but I understood this would happen when I asked for another chance.  
“Can we talk?” I begged as if it were just the two of us in the small clearing. He stared at me a moment longer before glancing at the Impala and back to me. I kissed Mary’s temple and then the top of Chaz’s hair, giving them a gentle push towards Sam. I could feel Cas’s eyes on me as I followed Dean, I knew he could see what I was now, I was thankful he hadn’t blurted it out as soon as I awoke.

As I joined Dean by the Impala he grabbed my elbow and shoved me against the car, using his weight to pin me there. I looked into his eyes, not fighting, instead opening my hands, palms facing him to show surrender.  
“Dean, I can explain everything.” I whispered.  
“Start talking.” He growled at me, his fingers still digging into my skin.  
“I thought I got a call from Mary, so I raced over there, when I got there, she wasn’t in the car, and I thought I saw my truck. I raced in and Sam…” I took a deep breath as my eyes prickled, “The demon made me see Sam dead, he made me watch as he killed Mary and then Chase. I couldn’t even fight…” My voice cracked and my shoulders slumped, Dean caught me but didn’t hold me, instead holding my shoulders in his palms, pressing me back into Baby, he waited for me to continue.  
“I felt a pinch,” I reached up behind my ear, “And then the kids disappeared.” A tear rolled down my cheek, my whole being ached to have his thumb swipe at it. My neck was craning forward, seeking the reassuring warmth of his lips. He held me in place but waited for me to continue.

“Pip?” A female’s voice called to me. I looked around. I was still in the apartment. I could see the demon over my lifeless body. I turned toward the voice.  
“Billie?” I asked, confused. I had an awful headache.  
“When they said Winchester, I had to come myself. I never expected to find you.” She offered. I shook my head.  
“What do you mean?” I asked, trying to take in the scene unfolding in front of me.  
“I’m here to take you upstairs.” She answered. I whipped my head back round to her.  
“No.” I blatantly refused.  
“Do you really want to end up a vengeful spirit?” Her voice softened, I knew she was trying to lull me into accepting. My will to fight, though too late, came back in double.  
“I want to speak to Death.” I announced, she looked shocked.  
“I know he was killed, but surely someone else runs it now, you’ve had decades.” I barked, she disappeared and in her place was a woman. A black dress with a plunging neckline, bare feet, brown hair that framed a beautiful and angled face, a small scar peeking out just below her shoulder.  
“You asked for me.” She stated, I blinked rapidly.  
“You’re death?” I asked. She smiled sweetly, but it didn’t reach her eyes, a slight nod her only answer.  
“I can’t leave them.” I said, but it was more me pleading. I couldn’t go, I wouldn’t go.  
“Your name was next on the list, you can stay here as a spirit, or you can come with me. But you’re not returning to your body.” She said simply, like that was all there was to it. I thought quickly, although I was friends with Chuck, this ultimately wasn’t up to him. Maybe…  
“I want to speak to Crowley.” I blurted. She looked confused and then laughed, the noise like a decorative wind-chime.  
“What do you think the King of Hell can do for you?” She asked, amused. I folded my arms and raised an eyebrow.  
“What does it matter? Will you allow it?” I pushed, my only reserve of force being wasted on this moment. She shrugged and clicked her fingers, a bewildered looking Crowley appeared. A sigh of relief left my lips, and at that he looked up, catching on quickly to the scene in front of him.  
“Pip? You’re dead?” He asked, voice full of concern. Tears welled in my eyes, how was it possible to be a spirit and cry?  
“I need your help.” I whimpered, he looked over his shoulder at Death and then took a step closer, tilting his head to bring my attention back to him.  
“I can’t pet, if it’s your time…” He started, I grabbed hold of his suit and pulled him close.  
“Hear me out, then tell me you can’t.” I begged, he nodded once, curling his hands over mine, both of us ignoring an intrigued Death.  
“If I choose hell-”  
“You don’t want to do that.” He interrupted. I shot him a look that silenced him.  
“If I choose hell, you can send me back as a demon.” I tried to persuade, Death gasped.  
“That’s cheating.” She spat.  
“How?” I bit back as Crowley seemed lost in thought, “You’ve done your bit. You send me to hell, then it’s up to the King.” I finished, looking back to Crowley, my eyes wide with hope. He swallowed hard.  
“Dean’s not going to like this.”

Dean stumbled back in disgust, I took an instinctive step closer, wanting to close the gap between us.  
“Baby, please understand.” I begged. I felt like that’s all I was doing, begging for my life, for understanding.  
“Understand?” He snorted, “How is this gonna affect the kids? They saw your dead body, how are you gonna explain that to them? How am I gonna explain killing you? I can’t even understand why you’d wanna put me through that, let alone them.” His tone was full of anger, but what started out as almost yelling became a hushed whisper.  
“You think I came back to torture you?” I asked, incredulous. “Dean, I came back because not even Heaven would make me happy without you and the kids.” I swallowed the anger that was rising, “I would sell my soul over and over to have more time with you.” I breathed. He stared at me for a long time.  
“Isn’t that what you’ve done?” The rage inside him came out in a hiss, I choked as if the words had crawled their way inside my mouth and blocked off my air. He smacked the top of the Impala, I jumped in shock, it was, however, what I needed to wake me from the nightmare that was this situation.  
“Dean. You can either plunge the knife in your belt, into my heart, or,” I offered, silently screaming at him to choose the second option, “We can discuss this further when we’ve both calmed down.”

***

“Are you going to be here in the morning?” Chase whispered as I pulled him into a hug and kiss goodnight. I leaned back, looking into his face and flattened his disheveled hair, my hands running down his head to rest on his cheeks, looking into his eyes.  
“Of course I am, baby.” I pulled him back under my chin, he had to bend slightly to fit as he was getting tall like his father and uncle, but he fit snug. I fixed my eyes on Dean over the top of Chase’s head.  
“I promise.” I whispered, making sure Dean could make out the words.  
I sat between Chase and Mary’s beds, stroking their hair as they fell asleep, as if they were back to being babies, finding comfort in my touch. Dean watched over me the whole time, and when they’d fallen asleep I followed Dean to our adjoining room and waited for the hushed yelling to begin.  
But Dean surprised me, he grabbed my face between his hands and brought his lips crashing to mine, it was an aggressive kiss. His lips stayed locked on mine and he pushed me back into the wall, slamming me up against it, knocking the air from my lungs. His hands were rough over my body and his stubble scraped against my skin.  
“Dean?” I whispered when he pulled away for a breath.  
“Don’t talk.” He instructed. I couldn’t help but feel a mix of emotions, it hurt hearing this, he’d never demanded anything from me while we were in the midst of having fun, and if he had it was playful. Although it made me want for him, it also told me that we needed to actually talk. But then his hand snaked between my legs and his lips clasped onto my neck and I decided talking could wait.

The next morning I woke up in Dean’s arms, he hadn’t disappeared and he wasn’t going to. I pushed off his chest and onto my elbow to look down on his face, staring into those deep sea-green orbs.  
“I don’t want to tell the kids.” I whispered, leaning in to give him a kiss, one that he met with as much love as I put in.  
“I would hope not, it might scar them!” He murmured with a wink, his hand trailing down my back to give me a squeeze. Dean’s anger had melted away last night, giving way to a crushing relief of having me back, no matter what form. And I’d met his relief with my own, thankful that I had the chance to be back in his arms once more.  
“Ha! You’re hilarious.” I said with so much sarcasm there’d be a puddle by the bed, “I meant about the…” I trailed off, I couldn’t bring myself to say what I was, a demon, not now. Dean nodded once and pulled me down to him, planting his lips on my forehead, consoling and caring.  
“But we have to tell Sammy.” He muttered, lips still against my skin, I gave a faint nod and that was that.

“Phillipa!” Crowley growled down the phone, I wrinkled my nose at the use of my full name.  
“We had a deal, you can’t shirk your responsibilities. You either attend cross road summonings or I put you back in the ground.” His voice was rough even on a voicemail and I couldn’t help the fear that came over me with the last threat. I hit the icon next to his number and waited for him to pick up.  
“Where’ve you been?” He growled upon answering.  
“Where do you think? With family.” I answered.  
“I need you to fulfill your part of the deal.” He bit, ignoring my statement.  
“How am I supposed to do that and be a mother?” I asked, moving to the bathroom and shutting the door upon hearing the kids arrive home.  
“I can take care of that.” He snarled. What had happened to one big happy family, where was the pushover, Crowley?  
“Are you threatening my family?” I snarled.  
“Don’t forget you’re with them because of me, pet.” He almost purred, I could hear the smirk. I thought for a while, I could end him, but that would effectively leave me in the lurch, I’m only topside because of him.  
“What’s the first job?” I asked, giving in.  
“Next time you get that tingle, don’t ignore it.” He instructed before ending the call.  
I put my phone back in my pocket and went downstairs to ask the kids about their last day of school before summer break.

“Hello?” Dean called into the house, Chaz was in front of the TV and Mary was in her room, no sign of Pip.  
“How was last day, bud?” Dean asked Chase while dumping his bag in the hall, eyes still searching for signs of Pip.  
“Yea good, Mom’s out.” Chase replied, pausing the show he was watching and turning to his now very concerned Dad.  
“Where’d she go?” Dean asked, already heading to their room.  
“She said she had to run an errand…?” Chase left his sentence open, waiting for Dean to fill in the blanks as he disappeared.  
“When’d she leave?” Dean’s voice wasn’t calm liked he’d hoped, he couldn’t hide the panic that had planted itself in his gut.  
“Half an hour ago, why, what is it, Dad?” Chase called, coming after his father. Dean rounded their door and sure enough, a letter was sitting on his pillow.

Dearest Dean, love of my life,  
I know it hasn’t been easy for you and I appreciate you not telling the kids the truth about the black eyes.  
But there’s something I have to do.  
Trust me when I say I need to be away from you all to do it. I’m sorry, maybe you’ll understand. because of your past  
I love you more with every minute that passes. Tell the kids I’ll call when I can, and make sure they know I love them, more than I can put into words. I’m so proud of who they’ve become.  
P x

Dean read it over and over trying to make sense of her cryptic “something I have to do” and the crossed out, “your past”. He let it fall back onto the bed and he pulled out his phone, running a hand over his face as he listened to the dial tone.  
“What’s happening, Dad?” Chase asked from the door, watching his Dad stress.  
“She’s not picking up.” Dean answered, “Did she say where she was going?” Dean asked, plugging in three numbers and holding the phone up to his ear again. Chase shook his head.  
“Squirrel!” Crowley answered, “Wondering when I’d get a call from you!”  
“What have you done with her?” Dean growled into the phone, Chase pressed against the wall as Dean stomped past. He watched as his Dad turned into the den and slammed the door. Chase crept over to the bed and picked up the letter, his eyes going wide when he saw the mention of black eyes. He knew something was up with his Mom ever since her return, she wouldn’t even tell them how she came back; but this was a whole other level.

“Let me get this straight, you summoned me here to sell your soul for a house?” I asked, incredulous that this was my first call out.  
“Not just any house, this one.” The young man said, handing me the print out.  
“Is this for a girl?” I asked, looking back up at him. He nodded sheepishly.  
“You two dating, engaged… what?”  
“We’ve been on a date.” He mumbled, I raised my eyebrows and snorted.  
“Sweetheart, you can’t ask for a house and expect the girl to follow.” My tone was gentle, I couldn’t help but look at this poor boy and feel for him.  
“You’re right!” He said nodding, I sighed in relief, “I want her to love me.” He said with a definitive nod.  
“What?” I spluttered. “That’s not what I meant.” My head shaking furiously.  
“Can we talk?” A gruff voice interrupted from behind me, I scrunched my nose at the oncoming yelling. I gestured to the boy to wait one minute as I turned and walked towards an angry looking Crowley.  
“What is it?” I snapped, the best defense is a good offense, right?  
“You’re not meant to talk them out of the deals. Just kiss to seal.” He spat in a hushed yell.  
“Oh, silly me, here I was trying to make sure the kid had a life!” I said, sarcasm rolling off me. I’d known Crowley long enough to know when to be scared and when to bite back.  
“You know who won’t have a life if you don’t seal this deal…” Crowley bit back. Now was a time to be scared. I ducked my head as Crowley disappeared. I stole a steadying breath then turned back to the boy.  
“You want Diana to fall in love with you, correct?” I asked, making sure I had it right.  
“And the house.” He added with a smile.  
“Right, Diana and the house.” I muttered, this kid was young enough to be my own - if I’d started early. I pulled him into me, my lips meeting his and when we kissed a spark shot through me, it was exhilarating, the thrill of a deal.  
“So… is that it?” The boy asked when I pushed him back.  
“Yep. Diana’s madly in love with you and the real estate agent will call any second.” I said before turning away, disappearing back to hell.  
“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Crowley purred from his throne, tucking his phone into his pocket.  
“That kid will have ten years with the woman he … and then he’ll die. What kind of not so bad are you talking about?” I snarled, I had to fight this feeling, when I’d sealed the fate of his soul, I’d enjoyed it, too much. And now my body screamed for more.


	6. Fighting with Dean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is flicks between points of view ... I'll try and make it obvious.

Dad had said he was leaving for work, but I knew he was going to try and find Mom, he didn’t know I’d read the note, didn’t know I knew about her being a demon. Mary had left early for a “friend’s” place, West’s, she was spending the week with him, amazingly Dad had let her, probably easier for him to worry about Mom and not worry about us, which gave me my own idea. After researching all day and tracking her “secret” phone, I had an idea that she was a crossroads demon. Which meant I could summon her, but I needed to prepare first and Dad would notice if anything went missing from his inventory.  
“Uncle Sam?” I said as the line picked up.  
“Hey buddy, what’s up?” Sam asked, he sounded like he was trying for relaxed.  
“Hey, I was just wondering if I could come by and grab a few more lore books?” I asked, I knew he had the key to the bunker, and this would be my way to grab it.  
“Yeah, of course, I’m headed out, but Lex and the boys will be here.” He answered. We said our goodbyes and hung up. I packed up a bag and shoved my laptop in, making sure I had everything then left, locking up the house. I sent Dad a text; ON MY WAY TO SAM'S, STAYING AT LEE'S FOR A FEW NIGHTS, HOPE THAT'S OK

“Hey Chaz, Sam said something about Lore?” Aunty Lex said upon answering the door, I nodded and smiled as she brought me into a one armed hug and led me through the house to the den.  
“You need anything, you just holler.” She said with a bright smile before turning back to the kitchen, leaving me alone in the den. I started shuffling through the desk, opening the secret compartments and finding nothing but weapons.  
“Chazy.” Lexi called out before rounding the door, I was caught, I looked up, a guilty look plastered to my face. I wasn’t like Mom or Dad, I couldn’t lie face to face.  
“What are you looking for?” She frowned at me, I looked at the mess I’d made and looked back up at her, maybe a twist of the truth?  
“I’ve read everything in here,” Truth, “And was looking for the key to the bunker,” Truth, “I thought they might have a few things I haven’t yet read.” LIE! I shrugged and fiddled with the corner of the desk.  
“I don’t think Dad’d want you going out there alone.” She said, an authoritative tone, I was silently begging her not to call Dad or Sam. “I’ll get a lift with…” Shit, think fast, “Mary.” I held on to the sigh of relief. Lexi narrowed her eyes then her face went blank … I knew I couldn’t lie.  
“As long as she doesn’t hold a rager!” Lexi said with a wink, turning and leaving the doorway, the sigh blew out my cheeks and a weight on my shoulders lifted. I stacked a few of the papers and closed everything I’d opened before joining my Aunt in the kitchen.  
“Be careful, don’t go prying.” She warned, handing over the key. I smiled and stuffed it into my pocket.  
“Hey, Aunty Lex, you got any of those oatmeal cookies?” I asked, yes I know, I’m Dean Winchester’s kid, but I couldn’t help my tastes in food, he’d kill me if he found out!

“I can’t tell you, I just gotta pick up a few supplies, that’s all, you can just drop me.” I said as I climbed into Mary’s car, she was so insistent.  
“I’m not dropping you, how are you gonna get home?” She insisted. Just shrugged and slammed the door. She floored it and we fishtailed away from the curb and down the road.  
“If you don’t tell me I ask Dad.” She threatened after five minutes of silence.  
“Fine.” I groaned, she glanced at me excitedly before turning back to the road. “Can you pull over before I tell you?” I asked, she glanced at me again, a frown on her brow, but she did so.  
“Ok, tell me.” She said, putting the car in park.  
“Mom’s gone. She left Dad a -” I tried.  
“What!” She almost screamed. I rolled my eyes and waited for her to shutup.  
“She left Dad a note.” I wanted to just spit it out, but I had to prepare her, “You know how Mom died and then came back?” I asked, she nodded at the new direction but stayed silent, “I think Uncle Fergus had something to do with her return, and now she’s a demon.” I mumbled the last part but she got it. All the colour drained from her face before it returned in full force. She was going a bright red, I placed a hand on hers and reminded her to breath.  
“How long have you known?” She said through clamped teeth.  
“Last night, I found the letter after Dad got home.” I answered.  
“How do we get her back?” Mary’s next question put a smile on my face, this is what I wanted to hear. That tone meant she was in, no matter the consequences.

DEAN:  
Dean set to work, digging a hole in the middle of the roads, burying the prepared box and drawing a trap over the top of it. He took a large breath, hoping to steady his nerves. He was about to summon his own wife and he had no clue how she’d react to being stuck in a trap, never mind being knocked unconscious. Dean checked the rock salt shells in his sawn off shotgun, just in case, and looked up and down the road for signs of life, all nervous habits, delaying what he’d come to do.

CHASE:  
“I’m right behind you.” Mary said, pumping the shotgun loaded with salt for emphasis. I shot a look over my shoulder and then turned back to the piece of paper I was holding, written in latin it was the incantation to summon a crossroads demon. I looked down at the trap, checking it again for any small fault, I’d been able to draw this symbol longer than I’d been able to write my own name, but knowing I was about to summon my own mother had my nerves in knots.  
“Out loud, Snip.” She called out, her nickname was one she’d coined when I’d shot her out of a tree with a paintball gun, it was short for Sniper, I wasn’t one for guns after that incident. I took a deep breath and began to read.

DEAN:  
Dean recited the incantation from the top of his head, he’d done this too many times to allow himself to forget. He waited, but she didn’t appear. He thought carefully over the words and tried again. Still no one. He dug up the box and checked the contents, everything needed for a crossroads summoning was in there. So where was she?

CHASE:  
“Chase?” Mom asked, she looked as if she’d just woken from a vivid dream, unable to tell if this was reality or still the dream. Her eyes shifted as Mary moved closer to me. “Mary?” Her voice raised, she moved forward and was stopped abruptly when she reached the edge of the trap.  
“We need our Mom back, Dad needs his wife.” I’m glad Mary said it, my voice would’ve given out, instead I focused intently on the second piece of parchment I had, reading it clearly and loudly.  
Suddenly Mom’s eyes rolled and her body fell, unconscious, to the ground. I shoved the parchment into my back pocket and followed as Mary quickly moved around me and prodded Mom with the tip of the shotgun, she didn’t move. She slung the shotgun over her shoulder with the makeshift strap and moved to Mom’s head. I took her legs and hoisted then further up for a better hold. We shuffled her dead-weight to West’s car and lifted her into the boot, lined with another demon trap under the spare tire.

We unloaded Mom from the trunk, thankfully still out cold, and carried, rather dragged, her through the bunker to the hidden room. I’d stumbled upon it in my search for more information, the shelf had shook when I’d accidentally tripped and landed against it, so I did a bit of moving and the back-room opened up, the demon trap set into the concrete, the neck cuff marked with demon binding symbols. I didn’t know if Mom could smoke out or not, and I wasn’t going to take the chance, rather I was scared that if she did I’d feel like she was abandoning us for good.

DEAN:  
“No, I didn’t read the parchment - Of course I did, Sammy!” Dean spat down the phone, fed up with Sam’s excuses for why Pip hadn’t come when summoned. “Ok Dean, I’m sure there’s an easy explanation, maybe she was mid deal somewhere else? Maybe she’s having words with Crowley, maybe she just…” Sam didn’t get the chance to finish his train of thought as Dean hung up on him. He didn’t need to hear the end, he’d been thinking it all night; what if Pip knew it was him summoning and specifically chose to ignore him?

CHASE:  
“What now?” Mary asked, dusting her hands after checking Mom’s restraints.  
“We have to inject all of these in, one every hour. I think that’s all.” I answered, Uncle Sam’s cure didn’t have much else scribbled down, only that it had worked on Dad.  
“Seems a bit simple” Mary announced with a shrug, she watched as I picked up the first needle with blood. Her phone vibrated suddenly, making us both jump, Mom was still completely out of it.  
“You haven’t turned that off?” I asked, scared that Dad could be tracking us, that he’d know about what we were doing.  
“Why would I? I’m meant to be at Kate’s, and what if it’s West?” She asked, her voice turning soft at the mere thought of him. I rolled my eyes, almost dislodging a cornea! She pulled her phone out of her pocket, it was still buzzing, she blanched and hit ignore call.  
“Who was it?” I asked, I knew Dad was on to us.  
“Uncle Sam.” She looked from me to her phone, it started buzzing again.  
“Just answer it and tell him you’re at your friends.” I instructed, she shook her head violently, I nodded just as hard. Finally she did.  
“Hey, Uncle Sam, what’s up? Sorry I missed your call, I was with Katie.” She could lie so effortlessly, even if she was terrified.  
“Hey Sweetheart, is Chaz with you?” He asked, quick and to the point wasn’t really Sam’s style, Mary and I stared at each other then I waved at the phone frantically, it’d been too long since he’d asked.  
“No, I’m with Sarah.” Mary replied, I face palmed.  
“You mean Katie?” Sam interrogated.  
“Yeah, Sarah and Katie. They’re both here.” What happened to my amazing liar of a sister? There was a long pause, I lifted my glasses and rubbed my eyes, frustration evident in my gesture.  
“Where is he, Mary? He doesn’t know what he’s getting into.” Sam was clearly angry now. I looked at how long the call had gone for and ripped the phone from her hand, hanging it up and turning it off.  
“What was that for?” She screeched.  
“He’s traced the call.” My tone matching hers. “We gotta start this now.” I said, pushing her phone at her and walking back into where we had Mom, no it wasn’t Mom anymore, Mom’s body, trapped.  
I took out the syringe and placed the vial between my teeth, taking care to roll her sleeve up, she stirred and lifted her head, looking straight at me, her eyes black.  
“You don’t want to do that!” She growled, then she blinked away the black and spoke again, “Baby, I’m so sorry, but we can work this out, please?” She begged, I took the vial from my mouth and held the needle at the crook in her elbow. The black eyes returned and she hissed, “I’ll snap your neck as soon as you mess this up!” She spat. I was frozen, I couldn’t help but look at this demon as Mom, this was Mom saying these things to me. A tear rolled over my lashes and down my cheek.  
“That’s right. Mommy’s not actually in here. Now let me go…” her sentence cut off with a sharp scream. In my frozen state I hadn’t seen May come in, I hadn’t felt her rip the syringe from my hand, I hadn’t seen her plunge the needle into Mom’s neck, pressing her thumb down and injecting my purified blood into her jugular.  
Mary had her eyes fixed on me and seemed to be drowning out all of Mom’s profanities and promises of torture. Mary felt her thumb finally touch the base of the syringe and pulled out the needle, none to gently, and slammed it onto the table in front of Mom.  
“You speak to him like that again, the next one goes in your eyeball!” Mary snarled, her face so close to Mom’s. She reached out and grabbed my bicep leading me out of the room. She gave me a gentle shove out of the way as she slammed the shelving doors on our still screaming Mother.

“It’s ok, Chaz, you don’t need to go in again.” Mary said, rubbing my arm once before leading the way out to the library.  
“How’d you do it?” I finally managed, I couldn’t help but wonder the whole time, how’d Mary just plunge a needle into Mom’s Neck and then threaten her.  
“To you it’s mom, to me it’s a demon.” Upon seeing that this simple explanation wouldn’t suffice, she tried again, “Chaz, you can find a monster within minutes, I can kill within seconds, we all have our own … talents.” She said, realizing how messed up that was. Kids our age would call grade six piano a talent, juggling, a different language; they were talents.

I listened as Mary kept injecting Mom, by the fifth she was starting to sound like her old self, but she was still begging for Mary to stop.  
But on the eleventh I heard the bunker door slam. I picked up the blade from the desk and stealthily made my way towards the main room, I suppose this was a talent, going undetected. I listened as the hush of voices sounded from the crowsnest. The heavy fall of boots on the iron stairs, and then the voices were louder, closer.  
“Dad?” I said, stepping out of my hiding place. “Uncle Sam!”  
“Where’s Mary, we need to have a talk.” Dad barked. Luckily Mom had stopped screaming and begging, she’d given in to her fate.  
“I’ll-i’ll go get her.” I stuttered, I knew Dad’d be pissed, I just didn’t realise Uncle Sam would be vibrating with anger behind him. I scurried off faster than dad could follow.

“Mary!” I whispered into the room, she carefully removed the eleventh needle and brought it with her, leaving it on the shelf that I shut as soon as she was clear.  
“What’s wrong?” Mary asked, taking in my pale face and hurried movements.  
“Dad’s here with Sam.” I breathed, her face dropped and the colour went.  
“Shit.” She hushed, I nodded and she wiped her hands on her jeans, following me.

“Why have you two not answered? I thought you were both with friends? What are you doing here?” Dad looked from me to Mary and back, Sam still a heavy presence over his shoulder. We’d seen Dad angry, we’d seen him concerned, but this was something different. I almost cracked there and then, but I stole a strong breath and bit my tongue.  
Mary on the other hand looked like she was going to crack, I gripped her wrist and stepped forward.  
“I wanted to do more research and Mary drove me, it’s my fault. Sorry.” I lied, I just lied to my Dad. What was I doing?  
“I’m so disappointed in you, Chase.” He whispered, letting his head fall. My heart broke. I reminded myself it wouldn’t be as bad as if he found out about Mom, if it didn’t work and if she disappeared forever.  
“What are you REALLY doing here?” Sam barked now, it made both Mary and I jump. The intensity in his look, the way he seemed to be much taller, bigger than ever before. I could understand why monsters ran when they saw him.

Mary and I managed to dance about the topic of Mom for the next forty minutes. All the while Dad and Uncle Sam exchanged knowing looks, much like Mary and I used to when we were younger, their silent conversations were worse than when they were speaking. It was getting heated again and I couldn’t stand it any more.  
“WHY WOULDN’T YOU TELL US MOM’S A DEMON?” I screamed across the table at Dad. The wind had been ripped from his sails, I’d never raised my voice at anyone before, I’d never had to, until now. An anger broiled inside me, I didn’t know how to control it, how to subdue it, I wanted to launch across the table and throttle Dad and Uncle Sam for treating us like children, for not believing we could be trusted with this information.  
I kicked the fallen chair as I stormed off, away from the stunned silence. I lashed out at the walls and kicked at the skirting boards, this was utter bullshit. They barge in and want us to roll over on helping Mom, they want us to give up our search and let them take care of it.  
Little do they know she’s here. We’re treating her, that’s right, the kids have got it. I found her. I captured her. I purified my blood. Sure I couldn’t inject her before, but I could now. I turned the corner to the filing room, pushed aside the shelf and there she was. Staring at me, her head lopped to the side, her black eyes shiny in the dingy lighting. I grit my teeth, set my jaw and stepped into the demon trap.  
“Come to set me free?” She sniped, although I noted all the energy seemed to have been sapped since our last exchange.  
“Don’t you know it!” I growled, I picked up the last syringe and forced her head to the side, lining it up with a previous puncture mark and slid it in. She screamed and I heard the footfalls down the hall, rounding the corner. I had seconds with this demon, before she gave up my Mom, before Dad burst through, before Mary could see me, before Sam could pull me from her.  
“You tell the whole of hell, the Winchesters are back in business, and we’re back with a vengeance.” I called over her screams, then I leaned down to her ear, the screaming stopped, “You tell Uncle Crowley, I’m coming for him.” I whispered. I removed the needle and let it drop to the ground, her body began to convulse, I stepped back and watched. I could feel everyone else in the room with me now. Watching as Mom’s chest heaved then her body sank back into the chair, dead weight.

“Back in business, huh?” Mary laughed, nudging my shoulder with hers. I chuckled along with her, but I’d meant it, deep down, I still meant it.  
“How’d you know about the purified blood?” Sam asked, actually interested in the process and how I’d found his research.  
“Everyone’s hackable. Sorry!” I said with a shrug and a smile, he messed my hair and I straightened my glasses after they’d come askew with his forcefulness.  
Dad and Mom had been wrapped in each other’s arms since all the tests had been completed.  
“Mary, baby!” Mom called to her, I hadn’t yet had my reunion with her, I think she was a little scared of what I’d whispered into her ear, of what I’d promised, maybe she’d already been human when I’d told the demon that I’d hunt down Crowley.  
Mary ran over and fitted into Mom’s arms so perfectly, I was jealous. I wanted that. When would Mom give me that?

PIP:  
“Can you give me and Chase a moment, baby?” I whispered into Mary’s hair, she nodded once and then fitted herself under Dean’s arm, dragging him away, I gave him a smile, laughing at the longing look he gave me. I walked slowly over to Chase, Sam giving my arm a squeeze and my temple a kiss before disappearing with them.  
“Chase?” I tried, my voice came out as a breath, I reached to him and in a flash he was squeezing me tighter than Dean had. My head fit into the crook of his neck, he’d been growing! “Thank you.” I whispered, I pulled him back and looked into his tear filled eyes.  
“I’m sorry we had to hurt you, Mom.” He said, his voice breaking, his fingers ghosted tenderly over the needle sight on my neck.  
“It doesn’t compare to the hurt you all went through. I’m so sorry.” I wiped at the fallen tears and he leant against my hand.  
We stayed like that a while before I braved my question.  
“Chaz, what-” I took a breath and he let his arms drop, sensing a need for separation, “what did you mean? You going after Crowley?” I asked, watching closely for any signs of hesitance. He swallowed hard, his eyes not wanting to meet mine; then as if a light came on in his head, rather as if a light turned off, he looked straight into my eyes, straight into my restored soul.  
“Uncle Crowley did this to you. And I’ll kill him for that.” He spoke, as plainly as if it were a school topic he’d aced. His tone sent a shiver through me, he reminded me of Dean when I’d first met him. Had he really grown this much since my return as a demon?  
“Mom?” Chase said tenderly now, searching for my attention again. “He’ll pay for what he tried to do to this family.” This was a young Dean, making a promise to avenge this family, to whatever end.  
This was history repeating. 


	7. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is it, we've reached the end, I hope you've enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

DEAN:  
This is right. I thought, looking over my family. My brother and his wife, nestled together at the end of the table, my twin nephews at the barbecue, my niece passing out the bread she’d brought with her from her bakery. My son and his partner bringing my adopted granddaughter from the car, my best friend Cas laughing with my son in law, West, my daughter reprimanding my two grandsons, her boys. And lastly, my wife, my perfect wife. She smiled and pecked my lips as she set the bottle of wine back down on the table, I pulled her into my lap and she laughed, that bright bubble of joy that started in her soul and emanated from her mouth.  
If you’d asked me thirty five years ago where I saw my life leading, I can’t say it was toward a full and happy life.  
Sure we really hadn’t escaped, but we’d managed to get the kids out, their kids need never worry about things that go bump in the night.  
“What are you thinking about?” Pip asked, taking our baby granddaughter off Matt, Chase’s partner, as they passed.  
“My life with you, Missus Winchester!” I answered.

PIP:  
I leaned in and kissed Dean’s lips, yes we were greying now and moved a little slower, we argued about small things and counted the days till the kids would bring theirs and visit, but we were happy.  
I pecked his lips quickly a few more times before breaking apart, he took Ava, our granddaughter, and bounced her on my leg. She smiled and giggled, making Dean’s face crack and light up, that blinding smile, those sparkling eyes, this man still had it!  
I looked around the table, our family, so happy, no sense of danger.  
I looked back at my husband, this was our not so perfect life; this was my Life with Dean!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The End!  
> If you enjoyed this, check me out on Tumblr: @plaidstiel-wormstache

**Author's Note:**

> This is a series I'd posted on Tumblr, hope you've enjoyed reading!


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